Dear all,
Make 2011 the year when all of your dreams come true. I wish you and yours a very happy New Year and happy, too,
whatever special occasion or day that you celebrate this time of the year.
My heart and thoughts are with you as we wind down the remainder of 2010
Gather 'round your friends, colleagues and family to laugh and share memories of all of the years that have gone by.
Remember the people that you have loved who are no longer with you.
Remember the fun and laughter from earlier celebrations.
Let the memories waft through the current celebration enhancing your joy and thankfulness with warm memories.
No matter which holidays you celebrate, my warmest wishes for your happiness and joy...
Cheers, and welcome 2011
Friday, December 31, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
dont judge so easily
This is from an old story, back in the '30s, in the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less. A 10 year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.
"How much is an ice cream sundae?" the little boy asked.
"Fifty cents," replied the waitress.
The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins he had. "Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.
By now, more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing very impatient. "Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.
The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said
The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry. As she wiped down the table, there placed neatly beside the empty dish were two nickels and five pennies. You see, he couldn't have the sundae because he had to have enough money to leave her a tip.
"How much is an ice cream sundae?" the little boy asked.
"Fifty cents," replied the waitress.
The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins he had. "Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.
By now, more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing very impatient. "Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.
The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said
The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry. As she wiped down the table, there placed neatly beside the empty dish were two nickels and five pennies. You see, he couldn't have the sundae because he had to have enough money to leave her a tip.
there is good in struggle
Motivational Stories
Motivational stories have the ability to lift us up, make us smile, encourage, motivate, and teach us valuable life lessons. Here are some motivating stories that will hopefully help you spark that motivational feeling. They give us an empowering sense of hope, that if 'he/she' can do it, so can I.
Throughout history, people have used inspirational stories to teach, encourage, and inspire in hopes that the listener will use it as a stepping stone and as an example to live a better life. Some will make you think, some will make you cry. Hopefully, some will give you that motivation to go for your dreams.
The important thing to remember when reading these inspiring stories is that when you get that feeling of motivation, where you want to do something, do something. Nothing is more of a waste than to be inspired and motivated and not take any action. Your life will only change as a result of taking focused action. An inspirational story is nothing if it doesn't cause you to do something or at least make you believe in yourself a bit more. Hopefully, these inspiring stories will change your life in some way.
If you have an inspiring story you'd like to share, please contact me. Enjoy these motivational stories!
To A Child - Love is Spelled T-I-M-E
Buy the Book and DVD to this video
The Story of Teddy Stoddard (read by Wayne Dyer)
What Is It?
The Story of the Butterfly
A man found a cocoon of a butterfly.
One day a small opening appeared.
He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours
as it struggled to squeeze its body through the tiny hole.
Then it stopped, as if it couldn't go further.
So the man decided to help the butterfly.
He took a pair of scissors and
snipped off the remaining bits of cocoon.
The butterfly emerged easily but
it had a swollen body and shriveled wings.
The man continued to watch it,
expecting that any minute the wings would enlarge
and expand enough to support the body,
Neither happened!
In fact the butterfly spent the rest of its life
crawling around.
It was never able to fly.
What the man in his kindness
and haste did not understand:
The restricting cocoon and the struggle
required by the butterfly to get through the opening
was a way of forcing the fluid from the body
into the wings so that it would be ready
for flight once that was achieved.
Sometimes struggles are exactly
what we need in our lives.
Going through life with no obstacles would cripple us.
We will not be as strong as we could have been
and we would never fly.
Motivational stories have the ability to lift us up, make us smile, encourage, motivate, and teach us valuable life lessons. Here are some motivating stories that will hopefully help you spark that motivational feeling. They give us an empowering sense of hope, that if 'he/she' can do it, so can I.
Throughout history, people have used inspirational stories to teach, encourage, and inspire in hopes that the listener will use it as a stepping stone and as an example to live a better life. Some will make you think, some will make you cry. Hopefully, some will give you that motivation to go for your dreams.
The important thing to remember when reading these inspiring stories is that when you get that feeling of motivation, where you want to do something, do something. Nothing is more of a waste than to be inspired and motivated and not take any action. Your life will only change as a result of taking focused action. An inspirational story is nothing if it doesn't cause you to do something or at least make you believe in yourself a bit more. Hopefully, these inspiring stories will change your life in some way.
If you have an inspiring story you'd like to share, please contact me. Enjoy these motivational stories!
To A Child - Love is Spelled T-I-M-E
Buy the Book and DVD to this video
The Story of Teddy Stoddard (read by Wayne Dyer)
What Is It?
The Story of the Butterfly
A man found a cocoon of a butterfly.
One day a small opening appeared.
He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours
as it struggled to squeeze its body through the tiny hole.
Then it stopped, as if it couldn't go further.
So the man decided to help the butterfly.
He took a pair of scissors and
snipped off the remaining bits of cocoon.
The butterfly emerged easily but
it had a swollen body and shriveled wings.
The man continued to watch it,
expecting that any minute the wings would enlarge
and expand enough to support the body,
Neither happened!
In fact the butterfly spent the rest of its life
crawling around.
It was never able to fly.
What the man in his kindness
and haste did not understand:
The restricting cocoon and the struggle
required by the butterfly to get through the opening
was a way of forcing the fluid from the body
into the wings so that it would be ready
for flight once that was achieved.
Sometimes struggles are exactly
what we need in our lives.
Going through life with no obstacles would cripple us.
We will not be as strong as we could have been
and we would never fly.
Friday, December 17, 2010
A touching story
Wooden Bowls
A frail old man lived with his son, his daughter-in-law, and his four-year-old grandson. His eyes were blurry, his hands trembled, and his step faltered.
The family would eat together nightly at the dinner table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating rather difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon, drooping to the floor. When he grasped his glass of milk, it often spilled clumsily at the tablecloth.
With this happening almost every night, the son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.
"We must do something about grandfather," said the son.
"I've had enough of his milk spilling, noisy eating and food on the floor," the daughter-in-law agreed.
So the couple set a small table at the corner.
There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed their dinner at the dinner table. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in wooden bowls. Sometimes when the family glanced in grandfather's direction, he had a tear in his eye as he ate alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence.
One evening, before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly: "What are you making?" Just as sweetly, the boy replied, "Oh, I'm making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food from when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
These words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears streamed down their cheeks. Though no words were spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening, the husband took grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.
For the remainder of his days, grandfather ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk was spilled or the table cloth was soiled.
A frail old man lived with his son, his daughter-in-law, and his four-year-old grandson. His eyes were blurry, his hands trembled, and his step faltered.
The family would eat together nightly at the dinner table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating rather difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon, drooping to the floor. When he grasped his glass of milk, it often spilled clumsily at the tablecloth.
With this happening almost every night, the son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.
"We must do something about grandfather," said the son.
"I've had enough of his milk spilling, noisy eating and food on the floor," the daughter-in-law agreed.
So the couple set a small table at the corner.
There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed their dinner at the dinner table. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in wooden bowls. Sometimes when the family glanced in grandfather's direction, he had a tear in his eye as he ate alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence.
One evening, before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly: "What are you making?" Just as sweetly, the boy replied, "Oh, I'm making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food from when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
These words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears streamed down their cheeks. Though no words were spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening, the husband took grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.
For the remainder of his days, grandfather ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk was spilled or the table cloth was soiled.
The Dew Drop
The Dew Drop
As the sun rose, a dew drop became aware of its surroundings. There it sat on a leaf, catching the sunlight and throwing it back out. Proud of its simple beauty, it was very content. Around it were other dew drops, some on the same leaf and some on other leaves round about. The dew drop was sure that it was the best, the most special dew drop of them all.
Ah, it was good to be a dew drop.
The wind rose and the plant began to shake, tipping the leaf. Terror gripped the dew drop as gravity pulled it towards the edge of the leaf, towards the unknown. Why? Why was this happening? Things were comfortable. Things were safe. Why did they have to change? Why? Why?
The dew drop reached the edge of the leaf. It was terrified, certain that it would be smashed into a thousand pieces below, sure that this was the end. The day had only just begun and the end had come so quickly. It seemed so unfair. It seemed so meaningless. It tried desperately to do whatever it could to cling to the leaf, but it was no use.
Finally, it let go, surrendering to the pull of gravity. Down, down it fell. Below there seemed to be a mirror. A reflection of itself seemed to be coming up to meet the dew drop. Closer and closer they came together until finally...
And then the fear transformed into deep joy as the tiny dew drop merged with the vastness that was the pond. Now the dew drop was no more, but it was not destroyed.
It had become one with the whole.
As the sun rose, a dew drop became aware of its surroundings. There it sat on a leaf, catching the sunlight and throwing it back out. Proud of its simple beauty, it was very content. Around it were other dew drops, some on the same leaf and some on other leaves round about. The dew drop was sure that it was the best, the most special dew drop of them all.
Ah, it was good to be a dew drop.
The wind rose and the plant began to shake, tipping the leaf. Terror gripped the dew drop as gravity pulled it towards the edge of the leaf, towards the unknown. Why? Why was this happening? Things were comfortable. Things were safe. Why did they have to change? Why? Why?
The dew drop reached the edge of the leaf. It was terrified, certain that it would be smashed into a thousand pieces below, sure that this was the end. The day had only just begun and the end had come so quickly. It seemed so unfair. It seemed so meaningless. It tried desperately to do whatever it could to cling to the leaf, but it was no use.
Finally, it let go, surrendering to the pull of gravity. Down, down it fell. Below there seemed to be a mirror. A reflection of itself seemed to be coming up to meet the dew drop. Closer and closer they came together until finally...
And then the fear transformed into deep joy as the tiny dew drop merged with the vastness that was the pond. Now the dew drop was no more, but it was not destroyed.
It had become one with the whole.
The Triple-Filter Test
The Triple-Filter Test
In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Do you know what I just heard about your friend?"
"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be good idea to take a moment and filter what you’re going to say. That’s why I call it the triple filter test. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"
"Well, no," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and…
"All right," said Socrates. "So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now, let’s try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"
"Umm, no, on the contrary…"
"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about my friend, but you’re not certain it’s true. You may still pass the test though, because there’s one filter left—the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"
"No, not really."
"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither true, nor good, nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"
In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Do you know what I just heard about your friend?"
"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be good idea to take a moment and filter what you’re going to say. That’s why I call it the triple filter test. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"
"Well, no," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and…
"All right," said Socrates. "So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now, let’s try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"
"Umm, no, on the contrary…"
"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about my friend, but you’re not certain it’s true. You may still pass the test though, because there’s one filter left—the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"
"No, not really."
"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither true, nor good, nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Do More in Less Time – And Have More Time for Yourself
Getting things done brings such a great feeling of accomplishment, but it can also be overwhelming if the task seems insurmountable. Sometimes, the days just don’t seem long enough to do everything we want to do. When that happens, worry can set in, but it doesn’t have to!
You can do more than you ever thought was possible, and in less time too, giving yourself time to relax and really enjoy life!
It all begins with a solid foundation of time management and scheduling. It’s okay if you’re not a good time manager right now, you can learn to be. It just takes a little bit of practice and you’ll soon be getting more and more done.
When you see how much you’re accomplishing, you’ll work even harder during your busy times, and enjoy those down times more thoroughly.
These scheduling strategies will help you become an expert manager of your time:
You can do more than you ever thought was possible, and in less time too, giving yourself time to relax and really enjoy life!
It all begins with a solid foundation of time management and scheduling. It’s okay if you’re not a good time manager right now, you can learn to be. It just takes a little bit of practice and you’ll soon be getting more and more done.
When you see how much you’re accomplishing, you’ll work even harder during your busy times, and enjoy those down times more thoroughly.
These scheduling strategies will help you become an expert manager of your time:
- Schedule your life for maximum benefit. You can avoid procrastination and the big stressed-out rush to meet a deadline by scheduling each day and using just a bit of self-discipline to stick to your schedule.
- It helps to break things down into smaller tasks. For example, do you have a big presentation coming up at work in two weeks? Don’t try to do it the night before it’s due. Start now. Working for just a half hour each day can help you get that presentation done with plenty of time to spare.
- By scheduling your day according to your priorities, you can better utilize the time that you might otherwise have wasted doing unproductive things, like watching television or waiting for the next item on your to-do list to come to you.
- Disallow doubts from getting in your way. That little voice in the back of your mind that tells you, “It’s too much work,” or “It’s not going to happen,” doesn’t know what it’s talking about!
- You can do anything you set your mind to. Keep that thought in mind as you go through your day. The more you think it – or even say it out loud – the more you’ll internalize and believe it.
- When you remind yourself how much you’re capable of doing, you’ll work harder so you can reap the rewards of being done with work.
- No matter how you reward yourself, make it a point to do so regularly. Finished that presentation? Take the evening off and watch your favorite movie! Whatever reward works for you is a good one – as long as the work’s done first.
- Recognize when you’re getting stressed and why. Sometimes, in an effort to get more done, you’ll find that you aren’t getting the time for yourself that you’d hoped for. When this happens, stop and reassess your schedule.
- Are you following your agenda? Are you productive during your scheduled working times? Are you meeting your goals? Where can you make changes for better success?
- Do you concentrate and get your work done during your working hours? If not, you may find that you still have to work when you should be relaxing. This is a vicious circle that leaves you feeling stressed, while getting nowhere.
- Eliminate your stressors while building in stress relief. Think about the following as you go about your workday:
- By focusing during working hours, you’ll complete each task much sooner. Get your drudgery tasks out of the way as quickly as possible to make more time for more enjoyable tasks.
- Work time is for work only – so avoid distractions. Ringing phones and other issues can stop you from accomplishing your work. Forward calls to your voice mail and establish “do not disturb” times. You’ll be amazed at how much work you can get done without distractions!
- If you complete your tasks early, keep working until your schedule says it’s time to stop. Perhaps you can tackle some work for the next day to get ahead. Being a little ahead gives you the flexibility to take care of inevitable emergencies without falling behind in productivity.
- Recognize when you need a break. People are not machines so your schedule should reflect that. Realistic break times should be part of even the busiest schedule.
Tap Into Your Inner Creativity
veryone has the ability to be creative – including you! Once you learn how to unleash your inner creativity, you’ll be able to tap into it, no matter what else is going on in your life. You might even be amazed at what you’re really capable of!
Discovering your inner creativity begins with looking inside yourself. The idea of “looking within” might seem foreign or even silly, but it’s really not as crazy as it sounds! There are many successful people who understand the benefit of turning inward for inspiration, happiness, and decision-making.
You may not always profit from your creativity. In fact, more often than not, your ingenuity will only benefit you and your family, and that’s okay! Your creativity can still bring you great joy and happiness!
Some people write, draw, compose music, build sculptures, or paint. There are plenty of creative pursuits for you to explore and enjoy. Even redecorating your house, revitalizing your wardrobe, or experimenting in the kitchen can be a creative outlet for you. After all, someone has to try new things, or the world would never change. So let that person be you!
If you haven’t given much thought to your inner creativity, getting started can be the hardest part.
Here are some things to think about:
Ask yourself these questions – especially the last two – openly and honestly, and discover your answers. You just might be astonished about what you find out about yourself. Perhaps it’s time to take that hobby and turn it into a living. Maybe it’s time to shake off the idea of living for others and begin to live for yourself.
Today is a new day to be creative, and a new day to touch the hearts and minds of others with what you have to offer the world. Are you worthy or capable? Of course you are! Let your inner creativity come pouring out.
Once you’ve started to discover your creativity, practice and experiment with it:
There are people who simply don’t like change. You might even know some of them. As your inner creativity comes out, these people may not support you. That’s okay, because it’s not their life to live. It’s not their race to run. Focus on what you feel in your heart and surround yourself with those who do support you.
Getting support from others can make a huge difference, but either way, you must be your own #1 fan! The best support comes from within, not from what others think is right or wrong for your life.
Using your creativity will inspire you to do even more with your life. You can’t possibly imagine where your creativity can take you if you just let it out and enjoy it. It doesn’t have to be perfect – and you don’t have to be perfect – to bring great joy to yourself and to the world around you.
Discovering your inner creativity begins with looking inside yourself. The idea of “looking within” might seem foreign or even silly, but it’s really not as crazy as it sounds! There are many successful people who understand the benefit of turning inward for inspiration, happiness, and decision-making.
You may not always profit from your creativity. In fact, more often than not, your ingenuity will only benefit you and your family, and that’s okay! Your creativity can still bring you great joy and happiness!
Some people write, draw, compose music, build sculptures, or paint. There are plenty of creative pursuits for you to explore and enjoy. Even redecorating your house, revitalizing your wardrobe, or experimenting in the kitchen can be a creative outlet for you. After all, someone has to try new things, or the world would never change. So let that person be you!
Tips to Focus on Your Inner Creativity
If you haven’t given much thought to your inner creativity, getting started can be the hardest part.
Here are some things to think about:
- What do you do for a living?
- What are your hobbies?
- What would you do if you could do anything?
- Who would you be if you weren’t worried about the judgment of others?
Ask yourself these questions – especially the last two – openly and honestly, and discover your answers. You just might be astonished about what you find out about yourself. Perhaps it’s time to take that hobby and turn it into a living. Maybe it’s time to shake off the idea of living for others and begin to live for yourself.
Today is a new day to be creative, and a new day to touch the hearts and minds of others with what you have to offer the world. Are you worthy or capable? Of course you are! Let your inner creativity come pouring out.
Once you’ve started to discover your creativity, practice and experiment with it:
- Make it a point to be creative every day.
- Try new ways to do things, even routine chores.
- Seek creative solutions to your challenges at work and home.
- Any time you do something differently or see something from a new perspective, you’re flexing your creativity.
Avoiding Discouragement
There are people who simply don’t like change. You might even know some of them. As your inner creativity comes out, these people may not support you. That’s okay, because it’s not their life to live. It’s not their race to run. Focus on what you feel in your heart and surround yourself with those who do support you.
Getting support from others can make a huge difference, but either way, you must be your own #1 fan! The best support comes from within, not from what others think is right or wrong for your life.
Using your creativity will inspire you to do even more with your life. You can’t possibly imagine where your creativity can take you if you just let it out and enjoy it. It doesn’t have to be perfect – and you don’t have to be perfect – to bring great joy to yourself and to the world around you.
Make Procrastination a Thing of the Past
Almost everyone procrastinates. There are always things you might not want to do, even though you know it may be necessary. The good news is you can avoid living like that. You can change the way you look at your tasks and make procrastination a distant memory.
There are all kinds of reasons why people procrastinate. Some do it because they don’t like the task, others do it because other things mean more to them, and still other people might be struggling with depression, sickness, or just feeling down. No matter what your reasons for procrastinating, you can take control and get things done.
It’s important to be able to do things that you want to do, but the reality is that someone has to take out the garbage, wash the dishes, or complete that long-winded business report. There should be a healthy balance between things you must do and things you do simply for pleasure.
Of course, what you like to do won’t necessarily be the same as what someone else enjoys, and that’s perfectly fine. Some people like to clean their homes. Others prefer to pay someone to clean so they can do something else. Neither person is wrong, nor should they try to convince the other person to change. They are both focused on what they enjoy doing.
If you want to stop procrastinating, your first step is to determine:
Ensure you get something when you give something. In other words, avoid doing a lot of tasks that you don’t enjoy without treating yourself.
It’s important that you reward yourself for doing things you don’t like doing. The reward should be simple and realistic, but also something that you can look forward to. A treat can be anything from a scoop of ice cream to your favorite movie to taking a walk under the stars – whatever brings you joy.
For example, you can tell yourself, “When I finish cleaning the kitchen, I’ll read another chapter in that book I enjoy.” You’ll be more likely to finish cleaning faster if you know you can do something fun afterward.
Rewarding yourself is only one good way to stop procrastinating. Making unwanted tasks more enjoyable so that you’re more inclined to get them done also works.
Try these techniques to convince yourself to complete those tasks:
There are all kinds of reasons why people procrastinate. Some do it because they don’t like the task, others do it because other things mean more to them, and still other people might be struggling with depression, sickness, or just feeling down. No matter what your reasons for procrastinating, you can take control and get things done.
Find What Matters to You
It’s important to be able to do things that you want to do, but the reality is that someone has to take out the garbage, wash the dishes, or complete that long-winded business report. There should be a healthy balance between things you must do and things you do simply for pleasure.
Of course, what you like to do won’t necessarily be the same as what someone else enjoys, and that’s perfectly fine. Some people like to clean their homes. Others prefer to pay someone to clean so they can do something else. Neither person is wrong, nor should they try to convince the other person to change. They are both focused on what they enjoy doing.
If you want to stop procrastinating, your first step is to determine:
- What you absolutely have to do
- What others have told you that you have to do
- What you can get others to do for you – either volunteer or paid
Be Sure to Reward Yourself
Ensure you get something when you give something. In other words, avoid doing a lot of tasks that you don’t enjoy without treating yourself.
It’s important that you reward yourself for doing things you don’t like doing. The reward should be simple and realistic, but also something that you can look forward to. A treat can be anything from a scoop of ice cream to your favorite movie to taking a walk under the stars – whatever brings you joy.
For example, you can tell yourself, “When I finish cleaning the kitchen, I’ll read another chapter in that book I enjoy.” You’ll be more likely to finish cleaning faster if you know you can do something fun afterward.
More Tips to Stop Procrastinating
Rewarding yourself is only one good way to stop procrastinating. Making unwanted tasks more enjoyable so that you’re more inclined to get them done also works.
Try these techniques to convince yourself to complete those tasks:
- Get others involved. Need to paint your house? Get your family or friends involved and then enjoy some time together afterward. Order a pizza. Watch a movie. Play in the yard. Do something that makes you feel joyful and connected. This way, you can actually look forward to it!
- Do one thing each day. Divide the task up into more manageable bits. For example, rather than cleaning your entire house in one day, just clean one or two rooms each day, on a schedule of your choosing. When you do that, the smaller tasks seem much easier to handle and you won’t spend your entire weekend cleaning.
- Set realistic deadlines and goals. If you set unrealistic goals, it’s easy to get discouraged. Avoid discouragement by setting goals and deadlines that are attainable. Your confidence and motivation soar when you know you can achieve what you set out to accomplish.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Positivity
“Can Do” versus “Can’t Do”
There’s something about the word “can’t” that raises the hairs on our necks. Maybe we don’t like limits being set for us. Maybe we are just rebellious kids at heart.
Think about it. You hear the word “can’t” and immediately your internal conversations start with:
Why not? … See. I knew she wouldn’t listen … Oh yeah, just watch me
Regardless, all of us would do well to heed the advice of communication specialists and minimize our use of the word “can’t.” Tell people what you CAN do – what they CAN do. Here are some examples: “You can have your vacation June 19.” “What I can do for you is .…” “Here’s what you can do….” “Tell me what you think you can do in this situation.
Sounds like a small shift, but it is the small things in communication that make all the difference in the world. We’re so accustomed to using “can’t” that this switch will require discipline. It takes practice but it’s well worth the effort. The difference between CAN and CANNOT is shorter in letters, but longer in results.
There’s something about the word “can’t” that raises the hairs on our necks. Maybe we don’t like limits being set for us. Maybe we are just rebellious kids at heart.
Think about it. You hear the word “can’t” and immediately your internal conversations start with:
Why not? … See. I knew she wouldn’t listen … Oh yeah, just watch me
Regardless, all of us would do well to heed the advice of communication specialists and minimize our use of the word “can’t.” Tell people what you CAN do – what they CAN do. Here are some examples: “You can have your vacation June 19.” “What I can do for you is .…” “Here’s what you can do….” “Tell me what you think you can do in this situation.
Sounds like a small shift, but it is the small things in communication that make all the difference in the world. We’re so accustomed to using “can’t” that this switch will require discipline. It takes practice but it’s well worth the effort. The difference between CAN and CANNOT is shorter in letters, but longer in results.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
what a difference an extra degree can make
212° Focus
In 1981 Jan Carlzon had just been named the CEO of Scandinavian Airlines. His company was in trouble. They had just been ranked by a consumer poll as the worst airline in the world. Last in service, last in dependability, and last in profits as a percentage of sales. Yet one year later, in the same poll, they were ranked number one in all three categories. What happened?
Carlzon had decided to focus on what he thought was the most critical issue…serving the customer. He wanted to keep it simple: identify every contact between the customer and the employee and treat that contact as “a moment of truth.” He set out to let his people know the importance of that moment…the captain, the ticket agent, the baggage handler, the flight attendant. “Every moment, every contact,” he said, “must be as pleasant and as memorable as possible.” He determined that he had approximately ten million customers each year, and on average each customer made contact with five of his people for approximately 15 seconds at a time. Carlzon felt that what happened in these 50 million contacts would determine the fate of his company.
He set out to share his vision with his 20 thousand employees. He knew the key was to empower the front line. Let them make the decisions and take action, because they were Scandinavian Airlines during those 15 seconds. He now had 20 thousand people who were energized and ready to go because they focused on one very important thing…making every moment count. Carlzon made it happen with 212° focus; and you can too.
In 1981 Jan Carlzon had just been named the CEO of Scandinavian Airlines. His company was in trouble. They had just been ranked by a consumer poll as the worst airline in the world. Last in service, last in dependability, and last in profits as a percentage of sales. Yet one year later, in the same poll, they were ranked number one in all three categories. What happened?
Carlzon had decided to focus on what he thought was the most critical issue…serving the customer. He wanted to keep it simple: identify every contact between the customer and the employee and treat that contact as “a moment of truth.” He set out to let his people know the importance of that moment…the captain, the ticket agent, the baggage handler, the flight attendant. “Every moment, every contact,” he said, “must be as pleasant and as memorable as possible.” He determined that he had approximately ten million customers each year, and on average each customer made contact with five of his people for approximately 15 seconds at a time. Carlzon felt that what happened in these 50 million contacts would determine the fate of his company.
He set out to share his vision with his 20 thousand employees. He knew the key was to empower the front line. Let them make the decisions and take action, because they were Scandinavian Airlines during those 15 seconds. He now had 20 thousand people who were energized and ready to go because they focused on one very important thing…making every moment count. Carlzon made it happen with 212° focus; and you can too.
Monday, November 1, 2010
“Open Minds are more Important than Open Doors”
This month I want to talk to you about this concept called the ‘open door policy’. Many organizations and managers practice this concept whereby subordinates are welcome to come into the office of a superior at any time to discuss any matter, give an opinion, provide feedback etc. From my experience however, I find that whenever employees use the open door policy, the response on the other side of the door is usually lukewarm or downright critical. Some of those who use this opportunity to voice grievances or provide feedback are labeled as ‘irritants’ or worse still ‘trouble makers’. In most cases, employees leave the ‘open doors’ with a bitter taste in their mouth. I cannot help but believe that these ‘open door’ policies have been put in place more to create a positive image for the manager i.e. that he is mature, open and welcomes feedback. In actual fact, the opposite is closer to the truth.
My view is that an open door policy is absolutely useless if behind the open door there is a closed mind. I would rather open minds than open doors. Having an open mind means being able to accept feedback and opinions no matter how dissimilar they are to your own. The objective of an open door policy is to provide a ‘safe environment’ whereby subordinates and peers can discuss a matter openly and to know each other’s views on different matters. The manager need not necessarily accept these views, but he/she must give the other party every opportunity to say their piece. The worst scenario is when they don’t even want to listen because they have made up their minds. What happens after that is that although the door is open, nobody wants to go through it. And organizations and managers then lament that “although we have an open door policy, employees seldom want to make use of it”. Perhaps organizations should start promoting an ‘open mind’ policy. I am most certain this will be much more effective!!
My view is that an open door policy is absolutely useless if behind the open door there is a closed mind. I would rather open minds than open doors. Having an open mind means being able to accept feedback and opinions no matter how dissimilar they are to your own. The objective of an open door policy is to provide a ‘safe environment’ whereby subordinates and peers can discuss a matter openly and to know each other’s views on different matters. The manager need not necessarily accept these views, but he/she must give the other party every opportunity to say their piece. The worst scenario is when they don’t even want to listen because they have made up their minds. What happens after that is that although the door is open, nobody wants to go through it. And organizations and managers then lament that “although we have an open door policy, employees seldom want to make use of it”. Perhaps organizations should start promoting an ‘open mind’ policy. I am most certain this will be much more effective!!
Saturday, October 30, 2010
A Peacock in the Land of Penguins
Foreword by Ken Blanchard, Coauthor of The One Minute Manager
Every once in a while a small book comes along that deals with a profound subject in a simple, elegant way. A Peacock in the Land of Penguins is such a book. I loved this book when the first edition came out in 1995, and I love this new edition even more. It provides important insights into the issue of creativity and innovation in the workplace – and it does so in a most engaging manner. Through the medium of a fable, this book helps us to see what can happen when we try to express ourselves fully and courageously in an environment created by executives and managers who view the world very differently.
Stories are a great way to convey important messages – they inspire and teach at the same time. People forget facts, figures and theories, but they remember stories. People who know me can tell you how often I use stories in my own conversations, in my speeches, and in my daily life. I love to write great stories, and I love to read great stories.
This is the story of Perry the Peacock – a bright, talented, colorful bird – who comes to live in the Land of Penguins. He soon runs into problems because the penguins have established a chilly organizational climate that is formal, bureaucratic, and governed by a vast array of written and unwritten rules. Although his talent is recognized, his different and unusual style makes the penguins feel uneasy. The very thing that he was recruited for – his distinctive flair and creativity – is now viewed as a “problem” by the penguins, once Perry is inside the organization!
His experience reflects that of “birds of a different feather” in many of today’s organizations. While executives and managers today say that they want new ideas and new thinking from their employees, their actions indicate otherwise. New ideas are disruptive, they’re messy, they challenge the status quo, they require taking chances and increased risk, and they push everyone out of their comfort zones. So people who are different, people with new views on how to make the organization successful, are often discouraged from expressing them – much to the detriment of both the individual and the organization.
This delightful corporate fable follows the adventures of Perry the Peacock and other exotic birds as they try to make their way in the Land of Penguins. Their story is both entertaining and enlightening. This is a tale of the perils and possibilities of being unique and creative in a world that values comfort, safety, and the predictability of conformity.
If you’re interested in new ideas for making yourself and your organizations successful, read this little book. Creating a workplace where new ideas and innovation can flourish is a top priority for managers and employees alike. There are important insights for all of us!
Every once in a while a small book comes along that deals with a profound subject in a simple, elegant way. A Peacock in the Land of Penguins is such a book. I loved this book when the first edition came out in 1995, and I love this new edition even more. It provides important insights into the issue of creativity and innovation in the workplace – and it does so in a most engaging manner. Through the medium of a fable, this book helps us to see what can happen when we try to express ourselves fully and courageously in an environment created by executives and managers who view the world very differently.
Stories are a great way to convey important messages – they inspire and teach at the same time. People forget facts, figures and theories, but they remember stories. People who know me can tell you how often I use stories in my own conversations, in my speeches, and in my daily life. I love to write great stories, and I love to read great stories.
This is the story of Perry the Peacock – a bright, talented, colorful bird – who comes to live in the Land of Penguins. He soon runs into problems because the penguins have established a chilly organizational climate that is formal, bureaucratic, and governed by a vast array of written and unwritten rules. Although his talent is recognized, his different and unusual style makes the penguins feel uneasy. The very thing that he was recruited for – his distinctive flair and creativity – is now viewed as a “problem” by the penguins, once Perry is inside the organization!
His experience reflects that of “birds of a different feather” in many of today’s organizations. While executives and managers today say that they want new ideas and new thinking from their employees, their actions indicate otherwise. New ideas are disruptive, they’re messy, they challenge the status quo, they require taking chances and increased risk, and they push everyone out of their comfort zones. So people who are different, people with new views on how to make the organization successful, are often discouraged from expressing them – much to the detriment of both the individual and the organization.
This delightful corporate fable follows the adventures of Perry the Peacock and other exotic birds as they try to make their way in the Land of Penguins. Their story is both entertaining and enlightening. This is a tale of the perils and possibilities of being unique and creative in a world that values comfort, safety, and the predictability of conformity.
If you’re interested in new ideas for making yourself and your organizations successful, read this little book. Creating a workplace where new ideas and innovation can flourish is a top priority for managers and employees alike. There are important insights for all of us!
Integrity
“Integrity is never being ashamed of your reflection.”
Without a doubt, your personal integrity is your most prized possession. Each day, that integrity is constantly tested, and you have an opportunity to prove it or lose it with every decision you make.
Doing the right thing is not always the easiest thing — but it is always the right thing to do. Choosing to do the right thing — even when it’s painful — ensures you will maintain your most precious possession throughout your personal and professional journey.
“There is no pillow as soft as a clear conscience.” John Wooden
“The time is always right to do what is right.” Martin Luther King, Jr.
“A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.” Proverbs 22:1
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have.” Doris Mortman
Without a doubt, your personal integrity is your most prized possession. Each day, that integrity is constantly tested, and you have an opportunity to prove it or lose it with every decision you make.
Doing the right thing is not always the easiest thing — but it is always the right thing to do. Choosing to do the right thing — even when it’s painful — ensures you will maintain your most precious possession throughout your personal and professional journey.
“There is no pillow as soft as a clear conscience.” John Wooden
“The time is always right to do what is right.” Martin Luther King, Jr.
“A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.” Proverbs 22:1
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have.” Doris Mortman
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Introduction of Customer Love
I’m a big fan of Nordstrom. My wife is a bigger fan! For many years we’ve been impressed with the “Nordstrom attitude” when it comes to serving their customers. A few years ago, we were in Nordstrom doing some last-minute Christmas shopping. As we were walking through the men’s department, an employee came out of nowhere and said, “Sir, wait right here, I’ll be right back.” I watched him run over to the next counter about 100 feet away, grab something and start running back. When he got back, he said, “Sir, I think you’ve been trying on sweaters.” I said, “How’d you know?” He said, “The back of your black shirt looks like it’s been snowed on, and it’s not snowing in here!”
We both laughed and he proceeded to remove the fuzz with his lint roller. After about 10 seconds he said, “That’s it…you’re free to buy more stuff. I hope you and your wife have a wonderful Christmas!”
After spending about one hour in the store, we each had three Nordstrom bags, and as we were walking out the exit into the rest of the mall, another employee ran over and said, “Let me keep all these bags here while you do the rest of your shopping. They’ll be right here, just ask for me.” He introduced himself, as did we, and he handed me his card.
About one hour later, with more packages from the mall, we came back. As we walked into the store, I saw the gentleman who had taken our bags walking toward us with a big smile, “Welcome back Mr. and Mrs. Anderson.” He then looked at our new shopping bags and said, “My goodness, you’re going to have a load. Can I help you take these bags to the car?” Now please understand, it’s Christmas, the store is full of people, it’s cold outside, the parking lot is full…and this gentleman is asking if he can help take our bags to the car! Even though I said “no thanks,” I knew his intentions were 100% sincere. I have to tell you the whole service experience on that day blew me away, but I’ve learned over the years, it’s business as usual at Nordstrom!
As the founder of Simple Truths, I’ve come to realize just how much people love great stories! Two years ago we published a little book titled The Simple Truths of Service: Inspired by Johnny the Bagger. The book was written by Ken Blanchard and Barbara Glanz about a young man with Down Syndrome whose actions changed the culture of the grocery store where he worked. The book has been purchased by thousands of companies to inspire their people to utilize their unique talents to serve from the heart. Feedback from around the world has been amazing!
That's what this book is all about. More great stories to inspire great service. Read them, have your team read them, talk about them together. In fact, you may be inspired to write your own Customer Love stories on the road to making your service culture all it can be.
Never forget: Customer Service is not a department, it’s an attitude!
We both laughed and he proceeded to remove the fuzz with his lint roller. After about 10 seconds he said, “That’s it…you’re free to buy more stuff. I hope you and your wife have a wonderful Christmas!”
After spending about one hour in the store, we each had three Nordstrom bags, and as we were walking out the exit into the rest of the mall, another employee ran over and said, “Let me keep all these bags here while you do the rest of your shopping. They’ll be right here, just ask for me.” He introduced himself, as did we, and he handed me his card.
About one hour later, with more packages from the mall, we came back. As we walked into the store, I saw the gentleman who had taken our bags walking toward us with a big smile, “Welcome back Mr. and Mrs. Anderson.” He then looked at our new shopping bags and said, “My goodness, you’re going to have a load. Can I help you take these bags to the car?” Now please understand, it’s Christmas, the store is full of people, it’s cold outside, the parking lot is full…and this gentleman is asking if he can help take our bags to the car! Even though I said “no thanks,” I knew his intentions were 100% sincere. I have to tell you the whole service experience on that day blew me away, but I’ve learned over the years, it’s business as usual at Nordstrom!
As the founder of Simple Truths, I’ve come to realize just how much people love great stories! Two years ago we published a little book titled The Simple Truths of Service: Inspired by Johnny the Bagger. The book was written by Ken Blanchard and Barbara Glanz about a young man with Down Syndrome whose actions changed the culture of the grocery store where he worked. The book has been purchased by thousands of companies to inspire their people to utilize their unique talents to serve from the heart. Feedback from around the world has been amazing!
That's what this book is all about. More great stories to inspire great service. Read them, have your team read them, talk about them together. In fact, you may be inspired to write your own Customer Love stories on the road to making your service culture all it can be.
Never forget: Customer Service is not a department, it’s an attitude!
Leading to Top-Notch Customer Service
Here are two facts you can take to the bank: 1) Superior customer service is critical to your business success, and 2) As a leader, you have an important role in making it happen. So, what can you do to foster the kind of service your organization wants and needs? The following ideas should help:
• The first step in providing good customer service is to hire the right people. Make your selection process part of your customer service strategy. During interviews, ask questions like: “If you get this job, describe the kinds of things you will do to provide superior customer service.” Also, pose hypothetical customer service situations and ask candidates to explain how they would handle them.
• Clarify your expectations about customer service. Condense them to 3-5 key principles, give them a label (e.g., “The Big Four” or “The Game Plan”), and communicate them to everyone. Then, have follow-up meetings with employees to ensure that they know exactly what is expected of them.
• Provide training, resources, and coaching to help your people develop customer service skills. Make sure all training reinforces your specific service expectations.
• Remember that people do what’s EXpected when it’s INspected! Include “customer service” in all performance evaluations and feedback sessions. Prior to conducting evaluations, ask team members to submit a list of the specific things they’ve done to help provide superior customer service.
• Celebrate successes! Recognize and reward employees who provide exceptional service. Share their stories with others. This will help motivate the entire team. Motivated employees go above and beyond for your customers … and for the organization.
• The first step in providing good customer service is to hire the right people. Make your selection process part of your customer service strategy. During interviews, ask questions like: “If you get this job, describe the kinds of things you will do to provide superior customer service.” Also, pose hypothetical customer service situations and ask candidates to explain how they would handle them.
• Clarify your expectations about customer service. Condense them to 3-5 key principles, give them a label (e.g., “The Big Four” or “The Game Plan”), and communicate them to everyone. Then, have follow-up meetings with employees to ensure that they know exactly what is expected of them.
• Provide training, resources, and coaching to help your people develop customer service skills. Make sure all training reinforces your specific service expectations.
• Remember that people do what’s EXpected when it’s INspected! Include “customer service” in all performance evaluations and feedback sessions. Prior to conducting evaluations, ask team members to submit a list of the specific things they’ve done to help provide superior customer service.
• Celebrate successes! Recognize and reward employees who provide exceptional service. Share their stories with others. This will help motivate the entire team. Motivated employees go above and beyond for your customers … and for the organization.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Adding and Subtracting Your Way to a Great Life
Honoring your unique self in life gives you an edge. Uncovering the real truth about your personal style and your preferences allows you to create a lifestyle that’s in alignment with who you really are – not the person someone else urged you to be. Part of your subtraction process needs to be deleting other people’s expectations and agendas for your life. By subtracting their scripts for you, you can write your own screenplay, choosing every detail, including only additions that you love. Carefully evaluate which life choices nourish you and which ones deplete your sense of well-being. Those insights are the gems from which you craft your original life episodes.
Inquiry: Are you following someone else’s casting call? Are you an artist at heart dressed up in a suit? Or a country soul living in a high-rise studio apartment? Have you made lifestyle choices because you were supposed to? What parts of yourself are you not honoring? Release your attachment to other people’s approval and set yourself free to select only the Positive Choices that are best for you
Inquiry: Are you following someone else’s casting call? Are you an artist at heart dressed up in a suit? Or a country soul living in a high-rise studio apartment? Have you made lifestyle choices because you were supposed to? What parts of yourself are you not honoring? Release your attachment to other people’s approval and set yourself free to select only the Positive Choices that are best for you
Saturday, September 18, 2010
ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING
I used to worry. A lot. The more I fretted, the more proficient I became at it. Anxiety begets anxiety. I even worried that I worried too much! Ulcers might develop. My health could fail. My finances could deplete to pay the hospital bills.
A comedian once said, "I tried to drown my worries with gin, but my worries are equipped with flotation devices." While not a drinker, I certainly could identify! My worries could swim, jump and pole vault!
To get some perspective, I visited a well known, businessman, Fred Smith. Fred mentored such luminaries as motivational whiz Zig Ziglar, business guru Ken Blanchard and leadership expert John Maxwell. Fred listened as I poured out my concerns and then said, "Vicki, you need to learn to wait to worry."
As the words sank in, I asked Fred if he ever spent time fretting. (I was quite certain he wouldn't admit it if he did. He was pretty full of testosterone-even at age 90.) To my surprise, he confessed that in years gone by he had been a top-notch worrier!
"I decided that I would wait to worry!" he explained. "I decided that I'd wait until I actually had a reason to worry-something that was happening, not just something that might happen-before I worried."
"When I'm tempted to get alarmed," he confided, "I tell myself, 'Fred, you've got to wait to worry! Until you know differently, don't worry.' And I don't. Waiting to worry helps me develop the habit of not worrying and that helps me not be tempted to worry."
Fred possessed a quick mind and a gift for gab. As such, he became a captivating public speaker. "I frequently ask audiences what they were worried about this time last year. I get a lot of laughs," he said, "because most people can't remember. Then I ask if they have a current worry - you see nods from everybody. Then I remind them that the average worrier is 92% inefficient - only 8% of what we worry about ever comes true."
Charles Spurgeon said it best. "Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, but only empties today of its strength."
Most of us want to be positive. It's advantageous to possess a sunny outlook. Doors open to optimists. They make friends, earn respect, close sales, produce loyal clients, and others enjoy and want to be like them. The question is how can we do that consistently?
That's what Attitude is Everything i
A comedian once said, "I tried to drown my worries with gin, but my worries are equipped with flotation devices." While not a drinker, I certainly could identify! My worries could swim, jump and pole vault!
To get some perspective, I visited a well known, businessman, Fred Smith. Fred mentored such luminaries as motivational whiz Zig Ziglar, business guru Ken Blanchard and leadership expert John Maxwell. Fred listened as I poured out my concerns and then said, "Vicki, you need to learn to wait to worry."
As the words sank in, I asked Fred if he ever spent time fretting. (I was quite certain he wouldn't admit it if he did. He was pretty full of testosterone-even at age 90.) To my surprise, he confessed that in years gone by he had been a top-notch worrier!
"I decided that I would wait to worry!" he explained. "I decided that I'd wait until I actually had a reason to worry-something that was happening, not just something that might happen-before I worried."
"When I'm tempted to get alarmed," he confided, "I tell myself, 'Fred, you've got to wait to worry! Until you know differently, don't worry.' And I don't. Waiting to worry helps me develop the habit of not worrying and that helps me not be tempted to worry."
Fred possessed a quick mind and a gift for gab. As such, he became a captivating public speaker. "I frequently ask audiences what they were worried about this time last year. I get a lot of laughs," he said, "because most people can't remember. Then I ask if they have a current worry - you see nods from everybody. Then I remind them that the average worrier is 92% inefficient - only 8% of what we worry about ever comes true."
Charles Spurgeon said it best. "Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, but only empties today of its strength."
Most of us want to be positive. It's advantageous to possess a sunny outlook. Doors open to optimists. They make friends, earn respect, close sales, produce loyal clients, and others enjoy and want to be like them. The question is how can we do that consistently?
That's what Attitude is Everything i
Friday, September 17, 2010
Build your dream team
“Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. The ability to direct individual accomplishment toward organizational objectives. It is the fuel that allows common people
to attain uncommon results.”
~Andrew Carnegie
to attain uncommon results.”
~Andrew Carnegie
Sunday, September 12, 2010
A Life-Changing Experience
We touch the lives of others in ways we often never know. People sometimes come into our personal world for fleeting moments and can leave us forever changed. We have more power to create or to destroy than we can imagine. We can leave things or individuals better or worse than we found them. A look, a word, a gesture has a tremendous impact and frequently we blither along blind to the effect every communication wields.
I learned this in a powerful way: It was a rainy, humid day: the mother of all bad hair days. I was riding on a bus downtown to go to work. Everyone was wilting. I was sitting next to a man in a business suit and didn’t pay him much attention until we both got off at the same stop and walked to the same newsstand to get a morning paper.
The man running the stand was obviously among those having a bad day. He was rude, abrupt and unsmiling as we purchased our papers, which served to add only more gloom to my day. The businessman caught my eye and smiled. He then proceeded to smile even more brightly, thank the newsstand proprietor for the paper and for being open on such a morning to make sure we were able to get our papers. In short he expressed his appreciation for something most of us would take for granted.
The man running the newsstand responded only with a grunt and a sour expression. The businessman then pleasantly wished him a pleasant day. As we turned away, I asked this man why he had continued to be pleasant to the newsman when he obviously didn’t care about and didn’t respond to his expression of appreciation and friendliness. The businessman grinned at me and said, “Why would I let someone else control what I say and what I feel or what kind of day I’m going to have?”
I never saw the businessman again, even though I looked for him on the bus on other days. He appeared briefly in my life and disappeared just as quickly. I don’t even remember what he looked like. But I’ve never forgotten the words he said, or the way his smile seemed like a shaft of light on a gloomy day.
That was a good 25 years ago, but the impact this had on my life has lasted. I never had a chance to thank him personally, but the way in which I choose to look at life as a result of those words is his legacy to me and my thanks to him.
Our interactions with the people we encounter can impact at least the next five people they encounter. A smile and words of simple appreciation multiply themselves geometrically.
We cannot control people and situations that come to us, but we can always control our responses to them. In each of our decisions lies our power to make a positive difference. It’s something anyone and everyone can do.
I learned this in a powerful way: It was a rainy, humid day: the mother of all bad hair days. I was riding on a bus downtown to go to work. Everyone was wilting. I was sitting next to a man in a business suit and didn’t pay him much attention until we both got off at the same stop and walked to the same newsstand to get a morning paper.
The man running the stand was obviously among those having a bad day. He was rude, abrupt and unsmiling as we purchased our papers, which served to add only more gloom to my day. The businessman caught my eye and smiled. He then proceeded to smile even more brightly, thank the newsstand proprietor for the paper and for being open on such a morning to make sure we were able to get our papers. In short he expressed his appreciation for something most of us would take for granted.
The man running the newsstand responded only with a grunt and a sour expression. The businessman then pleasantly wished him a pleasant day. As we turned away, I asked this man why he had continued to be pleasant to the newsman when he obviously didn’t care about and didn’t respond to his expression of appreciation and friendliness. The businessman grinned at me and said, “Why would I let someone else control what I say and what I feel or what kind of day I’m going to have?”
I never saw the businessman again, even though I looked for him on the bus on other days. He appeared briefly in my life and disappeared just as quickly. I don’t even remember what he looked like. But I’ve never forgotten the words he said, or the way his smile seemed like a shaft of light on a gloomy day.
That was a good 25 years ago, but the impact this had on my life has lasted. I never had a chance to thank him personally, but the way in which I choose to look at life as a result of those words is his legacy to me and my thanks to him.
Our interactions with the people we encounter can impact at least the next five people they encounter. A smile and words of simple appreciation multiply themselves geometrically.
We cannot control people and situations that come to us, but we can always control our responses to them. In each of our decisions lies our power to make a positive difference. It’s something anyone and everyone can do.
Turning Mediocrity into Greatness
I have had the privilege of competing against, coaching, being coached by and observing world-class performers since I was six years old. As a junior tennis player competing throughout the United States from ages 7 - 18, I became fascinated with what it takes to become a champion. My dream was to be ranked among the Top 10 players in the world, but I fell short. At my best, I hovered around the Top 500 in the world, and that's as high as I could seem to reach. Deep down, I knew I had the talent to make my dream a reality, and I knew the missing link was mental. After I hung up my racquet for the last time, I became obsessed with uncovering the mental toughness secrets of champions.
Starting in 1984, I spent every free moment conducting interviews with champions, reading their books and studying everything I could get my hands on about the psychology of peak performance. My friends said I was obsessed. They were right. This book is the result of my 20-year obsession.
When I started to implement the ideas in this book, my whole life changed. It wasn't overnight, but sometimes it seemed like it. There's no magic here, just practical thought processes, habits and philosophies drawn from the greatest performers in the world.
This book contains no theories. Every secret comes straight from the street of experience, either my own or that of our clients. This book is loaded with ideas you can implement immediately. Some will be familiar and some new. All of them have the power to catapult your results, no matter how high you're flying. It's been said that speakers and writers espouse wisdom on the very topic they need most. Now that you know my story, you know this is true for me. After 20 years of studying and teaching mental toughness to people throughout the United States, Canada and 10 other countries, I can honestly tell you that many times I still think like a complete amateur, operating out of the same middle-class consciousness that I ridicule in this book. After all these years, my mental toughness growth is still a work in progress.
The good news is that mental toughness is a skill that can be learned, and the tougher you get, the bigger you'll dream and the more fun you'll have.
Starting in 1984, I spent every free moment conducting interviews with champions, reading their books and studying everything I could get my hands on about the psychology of peak performance. My friends said I was obsessed. They were right. This book is the result of my 20-year obsession.
When I started to implement the ideas in this book, my whole life changed. It wasn't overnight, but sometimes it seemed like it. There's no magic here, just practical thought processes, habits and philosophies drawn from the greatest performers in the world.
This book contains no theories. Every secret comes straight from the street of experience, either my own or that of our clients. This book is loaded with ideas you can implement immediately. Some will be familiar and some new. All of them have the power to catapult your results, no matter how high you're flying. It's been said that speakers and writers espouse wisdom on the very topic they need most. Now that you know my story, you know this is true for me. After 20 years of studying and teaching mental toughness to people throughout the United States, Canada and 10 other countries, I can honestly tell you that many times I still think like a complete amateur, operating out of the same middle-class consciousness that I ridicule in this book. After all these years, my mental toughness growth is still a work in progress.
The good news is that mental toughness is a skill that can be learned, and the tougher you get, the bigger you'll dream and the more fun you'll have.
Monday, September 6, 2010
ah-ha"
Reading has been the fuel of my motivation, it has changed the direction in which I have traveled, and it has enhanced my creative imagination more than any other activity I have ever pursued. I'm now in my eighth decade of living and I still read several hours a day. Why? When I can hook up old information with new information the combination of the two creates perspectives that could never have been achieved otherwise. New information makes new and fresh ideas possible.
I read for the "ah-ha's," the information that makes a light bulb go off in my mind. I want to put information in my mind that is going to be the most beneficial to me, my family and my fellow man, financially, morally, spiritually, and emotionally. I seldom read anything that is not of a factual nature because I want to invest my time wisely in the things that will improve my life. Don't misunderstand; there is nothing wrong with reading purely for the joy of it. Novels have their place, but biographies of famous men and women contain information that can change lives. Dr. Norman Vincent Peale's, "The Power of Positive Thinking" changed my thinking. The Bible changed my believing. Ultimately, what I have read has changed my being.
If the "ah-ha" I get when I'm reading is not already reduced into one or two sentences, I'll take the essence of what I've read and chunk it into easily remembered bites of information. That information is what becomes "quotable." You would not sit still for me to read every book I've ever read to you. But if you're the least bit like me, you'll jump at the chance to bypass all the churning and scoop the cream right off the top - that is what quotes are...the cream of our learning.
The right quote can inspire people to change their ways. I love to quote my mother, "Tell the truth and tell it ever, costeth what it will; for he who hides the wrong he did, does the wrong thing still." Of course this quote didn't begin with my mother, but she is the first person who said it to me. Quotes, good quotes, are like that - you remember who said it, what the circumstances were, and that it had an immediate impact on your thinking.
I've compiled the quotes in this book with great care. I've included quotes that will help you on the work front, the home front, and the spiritual front. There are quotes to lift you up and quotes to bring you back to earth. Some will make you smile and some will create more questions than you might care to think about. All of them will make you think and that is an exercise in your present that will enhance and improve your future immensely.
It is my hope that you "get" the "ah-ha's" I got when I first read or wrote the quotes I've selected for this inspirational book.
If you apply what you learn to your life, I can honestly say that I will See You at the Top!
I read for the "ah-ha's," the information that makes a light bulb go off in my mind. I want to put information in my mind that is going to be the most beneficial to me, my family and my fellow man, financially, morally, spiritually, and emotionally. I seldom read anything that is not of a factual nature because I want to invest my time wisely in the things that will improve my life. Don't misunderstand; there is nothing wrong with reading purely for the joy of it. Novels have their place, but biographies of famous men and women contain information that can change lives. Dr. Norman Vincent Peale's, "The Power of Positive Thinking" changed my thinking. The Bible changed my believing. Ultimately, what I have read has changed my being.
If the "ah-ha" I get when I'm reading is not already reduced into one or two sentences, I'll take the essence of what I've read and chunk it into easily remembered bites of information. That information is what becomes "quotable." You would not sit still for me to read every book I've ever read to you. But if you're the least bit like me, you'll jump at the chance to bypass all the churning and scoop the cream right off the top - that is what quotes are...the cream of our learning.
The right quote can inspire people to change their ways. I love to quote my mother, "Tell the truth and tell it ever, costeth what it will; for he who hides the wrong he did, does the wrong thing still." Of course this quote didn't begin with my mother, but she is the first person who said it to me. Quotes, good quotes, are like that - you remember who said it, what the circumstances were, and that it had an immediate impact on your thinking.
I've compiled the quotes in this book with great care. I've included quotes that will help you on the work front, the home front, and the spiritual front. There are quotes to lift you up and quotes to bring you back to earth. Some will make you smile and some will create more questions than you might care to think about. All of them will make you think and that is an exercise in your present that will enhance and improve your future immensely.
It is my hope that you "get" the "ah-ha's" I got when I first read or wrote the quotes I've selected for this inspirational book.
If you apply what you learn to your life, I can honestly say that I will See You at the Top!
Charging your battery
The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday morning. Perhaps it's the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it's the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.
A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the garage with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it:
I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice. You know the kind; he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business. He was telling whomever he was talking with something about "a thousand marbles." I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say.
"Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you're busy with your job. I'm sure they pay you well but it's a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. It's too bad you missed your daughter's dance recital," he continued; "Let me tell you something that has helped me keep my own priorities." And that's when he began to explain his theory of a "thousand marbles."
"You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years.
Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3,900, which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now, stick with me, Tom, I'm getting to the important part.
It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail," he went on, "and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays. I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy. So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1,000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside a large, clear plastic container right here in the shack next to my gear.
Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life.
There's nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight.
Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure that if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time.
It was nice to meet you Tom. I hope you spend more time with your family, and I hope to meet you again here on the band. This is a 75 year old man, K9NZQ, clear and going QRT, good morning!"
You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to work on the next club newsletter.
Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. "C'mon honey, I'm taking you and the kids to breakfast."
"What brought this on?" she asked with a smile.
"Oh, nothing special, it's just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. And hey, can we stop at a toy store while we're out? I need to buy some marbles."
A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the garage with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it:
I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice. You know the kind; he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business. He was telling whomever he was talking with something about "a thousand marbles." I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say.
"Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you're busy with your job. I'm sure they pay you well but it's a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. It's too bad you missed your daughter's dance recital," he continued; "Let me tell you something that has helped me keep my own priorities." And that's when he began to explain his theory of a "thousand marbles."
"You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years.
Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3,900, which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now, stick with me, Tom, I'm getting to the important part.
It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail," he went on, "and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays. I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy. So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1,000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside a large, clear plastic container right here in the shack next to my gear.
Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life.
There's nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight.
Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure that if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time.
It was nice to meet you Tom. I hope you spend more time with your family, and I hope to meet you again here on the band. This is a 75 year old man, K9NZQ, clear and going QRT, good morning!"
You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to work on the next club newsletter.
Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. "C'mon honey, I'm taking you and the kids to breakfast."
"What brought this on?" she asked with a smile.
"Oh, nothing special, it's just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. And hey, can we stop at a toy store while we're out? I need to buy some marbles."
Friday, August 27, 2010
Gift versus Strategy – Two Perspectives on Recognition
Gift versus Strategy – Two Perspectives on Recognition
Sam is a conscientious and dedicated supervisor who – by his own admission – is from the “old school.” He has a strong set of beliefs that was forged early in his working career. One of those beliefs has to do with recognition. As Sam sees it, recognition is a gift – something special. By his way of thinking, “You don’t give people gifts for doing what they’re supposed to do ... for just doing their jobs.” Go way above and beyond the call of duty, and he will praise you. But merely do what he expects you to do and you won’t hear from Sam – unless, of course, you screw up.
Sam applies this management philosophy to all areas of employee performance and behavior. As a result, his people often feel unappreciated (taken for granted). And they’re much more concerned about avoiding problems than they are committed to doing their best work. The reasons for this are fairly obvious, and the results that Sam gets (or doesn’t get) are fairly predictable.
Gloria is a manager who works in the office next to Sam. She’s held a leadership position for several years, and she understands a lot about people and their behavior. Unlike Sam, Gloria doesn’t view recognition as a gift at all. Instead, she sees it as two things: 1) a “common courtesy” – a way to demonstrate appreciation for employees who make her life easier by doing right, and 2) a “strategy” for getting the performance she wants and needs from her people.
When it comes to the second point, Gloria knows that reinforced behavior is repeated behavior. And she uses that knowledge to build a high-quality work unit – and ensure her success as a leader in the process.
Don’t read this wrong. Gloria isn’t soft on performance. Just the opposite – she expects people to abide by the organization’s standards and holds everyone accountable for doing so. But she also looks for, finds, and seizes every opportunity to commend those who meet those expectations. As a result, her team members are motivated to demonstrate their job commitment every chance they get. In the end, everyone wins – especially Gloria.
Sam is a conscientious and dedicated supervisor who – by his own admission – is from the “old school.” He has a strong set of beliefs that was forged early in his working career. One of those beliefs has to do with recognition. As Sam sees it, recognition is a gift – something special. By his way of thinking, “You don’t give people gifts for doing what they’re supposed to do ... for just doing their jobs.” Go way above and beyond the call of duty, and he will praise you. But merely do what he expects you to do and you won’t hear from Sam – unless, of course, you screw up.
Sam applies this management philosophy to all areas of employee performance and behavior. As a result, his people often feel unappreciated (taken for granted). And they’re much more concerned about avoiding problems than they are committed to doing their best work. The reasons for this are fairly obvious, and the results that Sam gets (or doesn’t get) are fairly predictable.
Gloria is a manager who works in the office next to Sam. She’s held a leadership position for several years, and she understands a lot about people and their behavior. Unlike Sam, Gloria doesn’t view recognition as a gift at all. Instead, she sees it as two things: 1) a “common courtesy” – a way to demonstrate appreciation for employees who make her life easier by doing right, and 2) a “strategy” for getting the performance she wants and needs from her people.
When it comes to the second point, Gloria knows that reinforced behavior is repeated behavior. And she uses that knowledge to build a high-quality work unit – and ensure her success as a leader in the process.
Don’t read this wrong. Gloria isn’t soft on performance. Just the opposite – she expects people to abide by the organization’s standards and holds everyone accountable for doing so. But she also looks for, finds, and seizes every opportunity to commend those who meet those expectations. As a result, her team members are motivated to demonstrate their job commitment every chance they get. In the end, everyone wins – especially Gloria.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Contentment
Have you ever, at any one time, had the feeling that life is bad, real bad, and you wish you were in another situation?
You find life make things difficult for you, work sucks, life sucks, everything seems to go wrong....
Read the following story... it may change your views about life:
After a conversation with one of my friends, he told me despite taking
2 jobs, he brings back barely above 1K per month, he is happy as he is.
I wonder how he can be as happy as he is considering he has to skimp his
life with the low pay to support a pair of old parents, in-laws, a wife,
2 daughters and the many bills of a household.
He explained that it was through one incident that he saw in India that
happened a few years ago when he was really feeling low and touring India after a major setback.
He said that right in front of his very eyes he saw an Indian mother chop
off her child's right hand with a chopper. The helplessness in the mother's
eyes, the scream of pain from the innocent 4-year-old child haunted him
until today.
You may ask why did the mother do so; had the child been naughty, had the child's hand been infected?? No, it was done for two simple words- - -TO BEG!
The desperate mother deliberately caused the child to be handicapped so that the child could go out to the streets to beg.
Taken aback by the scene, he dropped a piece of bread he was eating half-way. And almost instantly, a flock 5 or 6 children swamped towards this small piece of bread which was covered with sand, robbing bits from one another. The natural reaction of hunger.
Stricken by the happenings, he instructed his guide to drive him to the nearest bakery. He arrived at two bakeries and bought every single loaf
of bread he found in the bakeries. The owner was dumbfounded but willingly sold everything. He spent less than $100 to obtain about 400 loaves of bread (this is less than $0.25 per loaf) and spent another $100 to get daily necessities.
Off he went in the truck full of bread into the streets. As he distributed the bread and necessities to the children (mostly handicapped) and a few adults, he received cheers and bows from these unfortunate. For the first time in his life he wondered how people can give up their dignity for a loaf of bread which cost less than $0.25.
He began to tell himself how fortunate he is. How fortunate he is to be able to have a complete body, have a job! , have a family, have the chance to complain what food is nice and what isn't nice, have the chance to be
clothed, have the many things that these people in front of him are deprived of...
Now I begin to think and feel it, too! Was my life really that bad?
Perhaps.... no, I should not feel bad at all... What about you?
Maybe the next time you think you are, think about the child who lost one hand to beg on the streets.
"Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, it is the realization of how much you already have."
When the door of happiness closes, another opens, but often times we look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one which has been opened for us.
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that! we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.
The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past,you can't go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.
Please send this message to those people who mean something to you, to those who have touched your life in one way or another, to those who make you smile when you really need it, to those that make you see the brighter side of things when you are really down, to those who you want to let them know that you appreciate their friendship.
And if you don't, don't worry, nothing bad will happen to you, you will just miss out on the opportunity to brighten someone's day with this message.
You find life make things difficult for you, work sucks, life sucks, everything seems to go wrong....
Read the following story... it may change your views about life:
After a conversation with one of my friends, he told me despite taking
2 jobs, he brings back barely above 1K per month, he is happy as he is.
I wonder how he can be as happy as he is considering he has to skimp his
life with the low pay to support a pair of old parents, in-laws, a wife,
2 daughters and the many bills of a household.
He explained that it was through one incident that he saw in India that
happened a few years ago when he was really feeling low and touring India after a major setback.
He said that right in front of his very eyes he saw an Indian mother chop
off her child's right hand with a chopper. The helplessness in the mother's
eyes, the scream of pain from the innocent 4-year-old child haunted him
until today.
You may ask why did the mother do so; had the child been naughty, had the child's hand been infected?? No, it was done for two simple words- - -TO BEG!
The desperate mother deliberately caused the child to be handicapped so that the child could go out to the streets to beg.
Taken aback by the scene, he dropped a piece of bread he was eating half-way. And almost instantly, a flock 5 or 6 children swamped towards this small piece of bread which was covered with sand, robbing bits from one another. The natural reaction of hunger.
Stricken by the happenings, he instructed his guide to drive him to the nearest bakery. He arrived at two bakeries and bought every single loaf
of bread he found in the bakeries. The owner was dumbfounded but willingly sold everything. He spent less than $100 to obtain about 400 loaves of bread (this is less than $0.25 per loaf) and spent another $100 to get daily necessities.
Off he went in the truck full of bread into the streets. As he distributed the bread and necessities to the children (mostly handicapped) and a few adults, he received cheers and bows from these unfortunate. For the first time in his life he wondered how people can give up their dignity for a loaf of bread which cost less than $0.25.
He began to tell himself how fortunate he is. How fortunate he is to be able to have a complete body, have a job! , have a family, have the chance to complain what food is nice and what isn't nice, have the chance to be
clothed, have the many things that these people in front of him are deprived of...
Now I begin to think and feel it, too! Was my life really that bad?
Perhaps.... no, I should not feel bad at all... What about you?
Maybe the next time you think you are, think about the child who lost one hand to beg on the streets.
"Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, it is the realization of how much you already have."
When the door of happiness closes, another opens, but often times we look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one which has been opened for us.
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that! we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.
The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past,you can't go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.
Please send this message to those people who mean something to you, to those who have touched your life in one way or another, to those who make you smile when you really need it, to those that make you see the brighter side of things when you are really down, to those who you want to let them know that you appreciate their friendship.
And if you don't, don't worry, nothing bad will happen to you, you will just miss out on the opportunity to brighten someone's day with this message.
Moments … That Define Excellent Leaders
• Find delight in your own discomfort. The way to keep your momentum is to actually seek discomfort – especially that which comes with change. This does not mean you are never satisfied with yourself or others. Rather it provides a healthy alertness of where you can improve. It will help you stay on the offense and thrive rather than playing defensively and merely surviving.
• When you feel you are cruising to victory, take a look around … but not only at your opponents. Look for anyone, any team, who is the very best at what they do. Compare yourself to them. What are they doing that makes them bigger, faster, better, smarter than you? Studying those who might have better “game” than we do keeps us humble and focused on improving our own game.
• Lead beyond the status quo. Always focus on the next level. If you can achieve your goals doing “business as usual,” then your goals are not big enough and you won’t get to the next level. Your goals should force changes, require tough decisions, and inspire bold actions.
The next time you are feeling comfortable, enjoy the moment … but for just a moment. Then, seize the very next moment to change!
• When you feel you are cruising to victory, take a look around … but not only at your opponents. Look for anyone, any team, who is the very best at what they do. Compare yourself to them. What are they doing that makes them bigger, faster, better, smarter than you? Studying those who might have better “game” than we do keeps us humble and focused on improving our own game.
• Lead beyond the status quo. Always focus on the next level. If you can achieve your goals doing “business as usual,” then your goals are not big enough and you won’t get to the next level. Your goals should force changes, require tough decisions, and inspire bold actions.
The next time you are feeling comfortable, enjoy the moment … but for just a moment. Then, seize the very next moment to change!
Friday, August 6, 2010
Walking the Talk Together
Ever wonder who they are? They seem to be everywhere. They must be a big and powerful group with a great deal of influence, because we sure do talk about them a lot:
“They should know better!”
“That’s their problem!”
“They need to do something about this!”
“It’s all because of them!”
“They’re the ones who fouled things up!”
No need to ask if these sound familiar. Who among us hasn’t pointed a finger at them before?
“They” and “them” are common pronouns ... part of normal, everyday speech. And when it comes to doing our jobs and walking the talk, they may be the absolute worst words in our language. Why? Just look at what “they” and “them” mean: OTHER PEOPLE, SOMEONE ELSE. You don’t have to be a genius to know that those words are dripping with non-responsibility.
Maybe it’s time we all did some word switching. Imagine what would happen – think of how our perspectives might change – if we stopped using “they,” “them,” and “their” altogether, and instead used “we,” “us,” and “our.” Let’s see …
“They We need to do something about this!”
“That’s their our problem!”
“It’s up to them us!”
“They We need to walk the talk.”
See and feel the difference? The next time you catch yourself starting to say or think the T-word (“they”), use “we” instead. The first step in taking responsibility is acknowledging that WE have it.
You know, pointing the finger at them probably is a waste of time anyway. We’re beginning to think they don’t exist. Every time we’ve gone looking for them, all we’ve found is US!
“They should know better!”
“That’s their problem!”
“They need to do something about this!”
“It’s all because of them!”
“They’re the ones who fouled things up!”
No need to ask if these sound familiar. Who among us hasn’t pointed a finger at them before?
“They” and “them” are common pronouns ... part of normal, everyday speech. And when it comes to doing our jobs and walking the talk, they may be the absolute worst words in our language. Why? Just look at what “they” and “them” mean: OTHER PEOPLE, SOMEONE ELSE. You don’t have to be a genius to know that those words are dripping with non-responsibility.
Maybe it’s time we all did some word switching. Imagine what would happen – think of how our perspectives might change – if we stopped using “they,” “them,” and “their” altogether, and instead used “we,” “us,” and “our.” Let’s see …
“They We need to do something about this!”
“That’s their our problem!”
“It’s up to them us!”
“They We need to walk the talk.”
See and feel the difference? The next time you catch yourself starting to say or think the T-word (“they”), use “we” instead. The first step in taking responsibility is acknowledging that WE have it.
You know, pointing the finger at them probably is a waste of time anyway. We’re beginning to think they don’t exist. Every time we’ve gone looking for them, all we’ve found is US!
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
ACCOUNTABILITY
Do you realize that in Malaysia, when something goes wrong, nobody is held accountable? Everyone plays the blame game and points fingers at others. An excellent example was when the ‘new’ stadium in Kuala Terengganu collapsed. Up till today, we do not know who was responsible. No one has come forward to accept blame and no one has been charged for the ‘disaster’. The prevalent attitude by the people concerned seems to be that it is better to go on the offensive and give any reason for the situation, no matter how ludicrous.
The most troubling aspect of this lack of accountability is that in a few weeks time, everything will be forgotten and life will go back to normal. Nobody is punished, nobody is held accountable and nobody will be blamed. And everyone will just shrug their shoulders and wait for the next ‘disaster’. What I find most infuriating is that the superiors of those who committed these errors of judgment have not demanded any form of accountability. Their silence has been most deafening. These superiors should rightly be blamed too because accountability is not only what we do, but also what we do not do. If you don't hold people accountable they will learn quickly that their behavior was acceptable and therefore will continue to behave in a similar manner in the future. Our leaders seem to be practicing a 'claim credit for anything good that happens and passing the blame to others when things go wrong' kind of management style.
In a recent survey in Corporate America in the aftermath of Enron, taking responsibility and being accountable now tops the list of desired CEO traits. It is not too late for us to start inculcating this value that acknowledging errors in judgment and mistakes is the ‘right’ thing to do. Obviously, this quantum leap in mindset has to come from the leaders themselves. Are they ready to abide by that maxim ‘leadership by example’? I must admit that I am not too optimistic.
The most troubling aspect of this lack of accountability is that in a few weeks time, everything will be forgotten and life will go back to normal. Nobody is punished, nobody is held accountable and nobody will be blamed. And everyone will just shrug their shoulders and wait for the next ‘disaster’. What I find most infuriating is that the superiors of those who committed these errors of judgment have not demanded any form of accountability. Their silence has been most deafening. These superiors should rightly be blamed too because accountability is not only what we do, but also what we do not do. If you don't hold people accountable they will learn quickly that their behavior was acceptable and therefore will continue to behave in a similar manner in the future. Our leaders seem to be practicing a 'claim credit for anything good that happens and passing the blame to others when things go wrong' kind of management style.
In a recent survey in Corporate America in the aftermath of Enron, taking responsibility and being accountable now tops the list of desired CEO traits. It is not too late for us to start inculcating this value that acknowledging errors in judgment and mistakes is the ‘right’ thing to do. Obviously, this quantum leap in mindset has to come from the leaders themselves. Are they ready to abide by that maxim ‘leadership by example’? I must admit that I am not too optimistic.
TEAM
Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. The ability to direct individual accomplishments toward organizational objectives. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results.
~Andrew Carnegie
~Andrew Carnegie
Friday, July 30, 2010
Clarity of Purpose
The first key to building an effective team is clarity of purpose and direction. As the old saying goes, If you don’t know where you’re going, how will you know when you when you’ve gotten there?
A team’s purpose is sometimes referred to as its “charter” or “mission.” The label doesn’t really matter. Whatever you call it, you have to decide why you’re in business as a team. It may be to lead and manage an organization or to solve a particular problem. Perhaps it’s to coordinate efforts across functions in your company or plan a large and important meeting. Your purpose need not be complicated, but it does need to be clear and understood by everyone involved.
Here are some questions to help pinpoint your team’s purpose:
• What is the objective for this team?
• What key issues will the team address?
• What will be the key activities of the team?
• What are the parameters and authority of the team?
• What are the team’s key deliverables?
• What is the timing of those key deliverables?
Answer these questions and your team will be off to a great start!
A team’s purpose is sometimes referred to as its “charter” or “mission.” The label doesn’t really matter. Whatever you call it, you have to decide why you’re in business as a team. It may be to lead and manage an organization or to solve a particular problem. Perhaps it’s to coordinate efforts across functions in your company or plan a large and important meeting. Your purpose need not be complicated, but it does need to be clear and understood by everyone involved.
Here are some questions to help pinpoint your team’s purpose:
• What is the objective for this team?
• What key issues will the team address?
• What will be the key activities of the team?
• What are the parameters and authority of the team?
• What are the team’s key deliverables?
• What is the timing of those key deliverables?
Answer these questions and your team will be off to a great start!
Thursday, July 29, 2010
'The person who loves others will also
A long time ago in China , a girl named Li-Li got married & went to live
> with her husband and mother-in-law. In a very short time, Li-Li found that
> she couldn't get along with her mother-in-law at all. Their personalities
> were very different, and Li-Li was angered by many of her mother-in-law's
> habits. In addition, she criticized Li-Li
> constantly. Days passed, and weeks passed. Li-Li and her mother-in-law never
> stopped arguing and fighting. But what made the situation even worse was
> that, according to ancient Chinese tradition, Li-Li had to bow to
> her mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in
> the house was causing Li-Li's poor husband great distress.
> Finally, Li-Li could not stand her mother-in-law's bad temper and
> dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do something about it! Li-Li
> went to see her father's good friend, Mr. Huang, who sold herbs. She told
> him the situation and asked if he would give her some poison so that she
> could solve the problem once and for all.
> Mr. Huang thought for awhile, and finally said, 'Li-Li, I will help you
> solve your problem, but you must listen to me and obey what I tell you.'
> Li-Li said, 'Yes, Mr. Huang, I will do whatever you tell me to do 'Mr. Huang
> went into the back room, and returned in a few minutes with a package of
> herbs. He told Li-Li, 'You can't use a quick-acting poison to get rid of
> your mother-in-law, because that would cause people to become suspicious
> Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will slowly build up
> poison in her body. Every other day prepare some delicious meal and put a
> little of these herbs in her serving. Now, in order to make sure that nobody
> suspects you, when she dies, you must be very careful to act very friendly
> towards her. 'Don't argue with her, obey her every wish, and treat her like
> a queen.' Li-Li was so happy. She thanked Mr. Huang and hurried home to
> start her plot of murdering her mother-in-law. Weeks went by, and months
> went by, and every other day, Li-Li served the specially treated food to her
> mother-in-law. She remembered what Mr. Huang had said about avoiding
> suspicion, so she controlled her temper! , obeyed her mother-in-law, and
> treated her like her own mother.
> After six months had passed, the whole household had changed.. Li-Li had
> practiced controlling her temper so much that she found that she almost
> never got mad or upset. She hadn't had an argument with her mother-in-law in
> six months because she now seemed much kinder and easier to get along with.
> The mother-in-law's attitude toward Li-Li changed, and she began to love
> Li-Li like her own daughter. She kept telling friends and relatives that
> Li-Li was the best daughter-in-law one could ever find. Li-Li and her
> mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real mother and daughter.
> Li-Li's husband was very happy to see what was happening. One day, Li-Li
> came to see Mr. Huang and asked for his help again She said, 'Dear Mr.
> Huang, please help me to keep the poison from killing my mother-in-law.
> She's changed into such a nice woman, and I love her like my own mother. I
> do not want her to die because of the poison I gave her.'
> Mr. Huang smiled and nodded his head. 'Li-Li, there's nothing to worry
> about. I never gave you any poison. The herbs I gave you were vitamins to
> improve her health. The only poison was in your mind and your attitude
> toward her, but that has been all washed away by the love which you gave to
> her.'
> HAVE YOU REALIZED that how you treat others is exactly how they will treat
> you? There is a wise Chinese saying: 'The person who loves others will also
> be loved in return.' God might be trying to work in another person's life
> through you. Send this to your friends and spread the love..
> 'A candle loses nothing if it is used to light another one'
> with her husband and mother-in-law. In a very short time, Li-Li found that
> she couldn't get along with her mother-in-law at all. Their personalities
> were very different, and Li-Li was angered by many of her mother-in-law's
> habits. In addition, she criticized Li-Li
> constantly. Days passed, and weeks passed. Li-Li and her mother-in-law never
> stopped arguing and fighting. But what made the situation even worse was
> that, according to ancient Chinese tradition, Li-Li had to bow to
> her mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in
> the house was causing Li-Li's poor husband great distress.
> Finally, Li-Li could not stand her mother-in-law's bad temper and
> dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do something about it! Li-Li
> went to see her father's good friend, Mr. Huang, who sold herbs. She told
> him the situation and asked if he would give her some poison so that she
> could solve the problem once and for all.
> Mr. Huang thought for awhile, and finally said, 'Li-Li, I will help you
> solve your problem, but you must listen to me and obey what I tell you.'
> Li-Li said, 'Yes, Mr. Huang, I will do whatever you tell me to do 'Mr. Huang
> went into the back room, and returned in a few minutes with a package of
> herbs. He told Li-Li, 'You can't use a quick-acting poison to get rid of
> your mother-in-law, because that would cause people to become suspicious
> Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will slowly build up
> poison in her body. Every other day prepare some delicious meal and put a
> little of these herbs in her serving. Now, in order to make sure that nobody
> suspects you, when she dies, you must be very careful to act very friendly
> towards her. 'Don't argue with her, obey her every wish, and treat her like
> a queen.' Li-Li was so happy. She thanked Mr. Huang and hurried home to
> start her plot of murdering her mother-in-law. Weeks went by, and months
> went by, and every other day, Li-Li served the specially treated food to her
> mother-in-law. She remembered what Mr. Huang had said about avoiding
> suspicion, so she controlled her temper! , obeyed her mother-in-law, and
> treated her like her own mother.
> After six months had passed, the whole household had changed.. Li-Li had
> practiced controlling her temper so much that she found that she almost
> never got mad or upset. She hadn't had an argument with her mother-in-law in
> six months because she now seemed much kinder and easier to get along with.
> The mother-in-law's attitude toward Li-Li changed, and she began to love
> Li-Li like her own daughter. She kept telling friends and relatives that
> Li-Li was the best daughter-in-law one could ever find. Li-Li and her
> mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real mother and daughter.
> Li-Li's husband was very happy to see what was happening. One day, Li-Li
> came to see Mr. Huang and asked for his help again She said, 'Dear Mr.
> Huang, please help me to keep the poison from killing my mother-in-law.
> She's changed into such a nice woman, and I love her like my own mother. I
> do not want her to die because of the poison I gave her.'
> Mr. Huang smiled and nodded his head. 'Li-Li, there's nothing to worry
> about. I never gave you any poison. The herbs I gave you were vitamins to
> improve her health. The only poison was in your mind and your attitude
> toward her, but that has been all washed away by the love which you gave to
> her.'
> HAVE YOU REALIZED that how you treat others is exactly how they will treat
> you? There is a wise Chinese saying: 'The person who loves others will also
> be loved in return.' God might be trying to work in another person's life
> through you. Send this to your friends and spread the love..
> 'A candle loses nothing if it is used to light another one'
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Accepting Your “Mutual Rightness”
As humans, our values and perspectives are shaped by the myriad of people, experiences, environments, and events we encounter during our formative years (our “youth”). We’re all natural “products of our times.” And as such, with few exceptions, each of us is normal … each of us is RIGHT – regardless of how we may vary from others.
Certainly, there are times when differing viewpoints are unacceptable. Take, for example, the small handful of people who believe it’s perfectly okay to lie, cheat, steal, and disrespect their way to success. No matter how you cut it, those folks are just plain wrong and should not be tolerated, much less condoned. But, we all know that they are the extreme exception rather than the general rule. For the most part, being “different” doesn’t make you wrong – it just makes you different. And that’s something all of us need to come to grips with and accept.
Just as your beliefs are appropriate and correct for you, coworkers who don’t share your views have beliefs, mindsets, and attitudes that are equally appropriate and correct … for them. Ignore this fact – label them “wrong” – and you’ll self-righteously presume that “they need to change” (and stubbornly wait for them to do it). But acknowledge and accept that they are as right as you are, and you’re more likely to pursue more respectful and collaborative ways of working together through which everyone wins.
Certainly, there are times when differing viewpoints are unacceptable. Take, for example, the small handful of people who believe it’s perfectly okay to lie, cheat, steal, and disrespect their way to success. No matter how you cut it, those folks are just plain wrong and should not be tolerated, much less condoned. But, we all know that they are the extreme exception rather than the general rule. For the most part, being “different” doesn’t make you wrong – it just makes you different. And that’s something all of us need to come to grips with and accept.
Just as your beliefs are appropriate and correct for you, coworkers who don’t share your views have beliefs, mindsets, and attitudes that are equally appropriate and correct … for them. Ignore this fact – label them “wrong” – and you’ll self-righteously presume that “they need to change” (and stubbornly wait for them to do it). But acknowledge and accept that they are as right as you are, and you’re more likely to pursue more respectful and collaborative ways of working together through which everyone wins.
Friday, July 16, 2010
Get More Done Every Workday
• Is the meeting necessary? That’s the first question to ask and answer. Before calling a meeting, make sure it has a purpose. Routine meetings – meetings that occur simply because they always happen every Monday at 10:00 a.m. – are not a good investment unless they fulfill or advance your objective.
• At least 24 hours before the meeting, distribute an agenda addressing four important attendee questions: 1) Why am I investing time in this meeting? 2) How long will it last? 3) Who’s attending? 4) What’s the purpose, goals, and expectations?
• Make the meeting short. Most managers say at least one-half of their meeting time is wasted. That averages out to 5 hours per week, 250 hours per year for each person involved. Wow! Make it a goal to cut your meeting time in half. If people are prepared before they arrive, most meetings could be accomplished in half the time.
• Make a point to start on time. If people come in late, ignore them and keep going. Don’t recap what’s already covered. If you do, you’re simply rewarding the tardy person and punishing on-time folks.
• If it’s not important they hear what is scheduled for the rest of the meeting, consider offering participants the option of leaving after they have completed their portion.
• Meeting’s over. But wait! Do you really think everyone knows what they’re supposed to do next? Don’t assume anything! Before leaving the meeting, recap so everyone knows who’s responsible for any next steps, when action should take place, and how results will be communicated.
• At least 24 hours before the meeting, distribute an agenda addressing four important attendee questions: 1) Why am I investing time in this meeting? 2) How long will it last? 3) Who’s attending? 4) What’s the purpose, goals, and expectations?
• Make the meeting short. Most managers say at least one-half of their meeting time is wasted. That averages out to 5 hours per week, 250 hours per year for each person involved. Wow! Make it a goal to cut your meeting time in half. If people are prepared before they arrive, most meetings could be accomplished in half the time.
• Make a point to start on time. If people come in late, ignore them and keep going. Don’t recap what’s already covered. If you do, you’re simply rewarding the tardy person and punishing on-time folks.
• If it’s not important they hear what is scheduled for the rest of the meeting, consider offering participants the option of leaving after they have completed their portion.
• Meeting’s over. But wait! Do you really think everyone knows what they’re supposed to do next? Don’t assume anything! Before leaving the meeting, recap so everyone knows who’s responsible for any next steps, when action should take place, and how results will be communicated.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Be Aware of Your Thinking
the more you dwell upon it, the more life you give to that thought. Give it
enough life, and it will become real. So make sure the thought is indeed a
great one."
-- Ralph Marston
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Getting Good at Getting Along
Begin by Understanding Yourself
Since the early days of civilization sages have been teaching about the importance of self-knowledge and self-awareness. The Oracle at Delphi said, “Know thyself.” Socrates wrote, “The unexamined life is not worth living.”
There are two people in any relationship and one of them is YOU. So if you want to have good relationships with others — both at work and in your personal life — the best place to start is with yourself.
What motivates you? Power? Achievement? Affiliation? Which is more important to you: to be respected or to be liked? What makes you angry? What are your hot buttons? What kinds of people do you enjoy working with and what kinds of people drive you crazy? And do you know why?
People Facts 101.1
What do all your relationships have in common? YOU! You are the single biggest factor in your success (or failure) when working with others.
Since the early days of civilization sages have been teaching about the importance of self-knowledge and self-awareness. The Oracle at Delphi said, “Know thyself.” Socrates wrote, “The unexamined life is not worth living.”
There are two people in any relationship and one of them is YOU. So if you want to have good relationships with others — both at work and in your personal life — the best place to start is with yourself.
What motivates you? Power? Achievement? Affiliation? Which is more important to you: to be respected or to be liked? What makes you angry? What are your hot buttons? What kinds of people do you enjoy working with and what kinds of people drive you crazy? And do you know why?
People Facts 101.1
What do all your relationships have in common? YOU! You are the single biggest factor in your success (or failure) when working with others.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
The Wisdom of Wolves
Every wolf has his own voice. Every wolf respects the voice of every other wolf.
There is not a more eerie, mournful, frightening or beautiful sound at night than the musical extravaganza of a howling wolf pack. Campers and hunters who have heard this chorus are filled with wonder but are also usually immobilized by fear. Because of the melody of voices, it often sounds like they are surrounded by scores of wolves.
In truth, there are usually no more than five to eight wolves howling in a pack. The secret is that the wolves are always careful not to duplicate each other. Each wolf assumes a unique pitch, respecting the distinctiveness of the other members of the pack. While the notes may change, as in any beautiful song, one wolf will not copy the pitch of another.
Interestingly, this respect for the individual only emphasizes the true unity of the group. They are one, but they are individuals, each contributing to the organization in their own unique way. Every wolf has his own voice. Every wolf respects the voice of every other wolf.
While no one knows for sure why wolves sing, nature has blessed them with a talent they have perfected through the generations. However, we can make some educated guesses about the phenomenon; they are happy, excited, playful, territorial, and sorrowful. They may be simply reaffirming the spirit and unity of their pack. After all, why do birds sing? Why do we?
An additional reason that wolves may howl is that it provides a time, a place and an event for all social barriers to be broken. Wolves have a strong social order, with each member understanding its role and place. When we observe wolves eating together, we see what seems to be curtsies, bows, whines and hugs—all according to each member’s “place” in the organization. But when wolves howl together, all barriers are dropped, as if to say, “We are one, but we are all unique, so don’t tread on us.” As anyone who has ever listened to this magical howling choir will testify, its message is heard.
The wolf symphony makes the pack appear a much more formidable foe than would be the case if they all sounded the same. No wonder intruders become confused and frightened at what they assume to be an army of wolves.
So, too, are human organizations and families more formidable when the awareness of each individual is celebrated rather than stifled. Each person assumes his share of responsibility for the group by employing his special talents and strengths. By members expressing their own uniqueness and respecting and encouraging the uniqueness of others, the unit becomes a strong, formidable one.
“Over the years I’ve learned a lot about coaching staffs and one piece of advice I would pass along to a young head coach—or a corporate executive, or even a bank president—is this: Don’t make them in your image. Don’t even try. My assistants don’t look alike, think alike, or have the same personalities. And I sure don’t want them thinking like I do. You don’t strive for sameness, you strive for balance.”
~Bear Bryant
Questions to Ponder:
Business
Interdepartmental teams (TQM, CQI, focus groups, etc.) are now utilized worldwide to constantly improve products, services and customer awareness. Unfortunately, these teams are often formed without regard to the psychological makeup of the team members. Outstanding teams consist of individuals with differing gifts. There are several ways to enhance team selection, such as the use of the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), which I frequently administer to groups. How do you make sure your team members will bring out the best in each other?
Family
Do you believe in birth order difference among children? Is it true that most people are tougher on their first born, more indecisive with middle children, and easiest on the baby? Do you respect and enjoy your family members’ differences, or do you try to force them to fit your preconceived mold?
Personal
We all possess unique gifts. We can either contribute these gifts toward the success of our work team and family, or we can use our uniqueness as an excuse to remain aloof and weaken the unit. What are your special contributions? How are you using them?
Copyright Simple Truths, LLC, all rights reserved and reprinted with permission.
There is not a more eerie, mournful, frightening or beautiful sound at night than the musical extravaganza of a howling wolf pack. Campers and hunters who have heard this chorus are filled with wonder but are also usually immobilized by fear. Because of the melody of voices, it often sounds like they are surrounded by scores of wolves.
In truth, there are usually no more than five to eight wolves howling in a pack. The secret is that the wolves are always careful not to duplicate each other. Each wolf assumes a unique pitch, respecting the distinctiveness of the other members of the pack. While the notes may change, as in any beautiful song, one wolf will not copy the pitch of another.
Interestingly, this respect for the individual only emphasizes the true unity of the group. They are one, but they are individuals, each contributing to the organization in their own unique way. Every wolf has his own voice. Every wolf respects the voice of every other wolf.
While no one knows for sure why wolves sing, nature has blessed them with a talent they have perfected through the generations. However, we can make some educated guesses about the phenomenon; they are happy, excited, playful, territorial, and sorrowful. They may be simply reaffirming the spirit and unity of their pack. After all, why do birds sing? Why do we?
An additional reason that wolves may howl is that it provides a time, a place and an event for all social barriers to be broken. Wolves have a strong social order, with each member understanding its role and place. When we observe wolves eating together, we see what seems to be curtsies, bows, whines and hugs—all according to each member’s “place” in the organization. But when wolves howl together, all barriers are dropped, as if to say, “We are one, but we are all unique, so don’t tread on us.” As anyone who has ever listened to this magical howling choir will testify, its message is heard.
The wolf symphony makes the pack appear a much more formidable foe than would be the case if they all sounded the same. No wonder intruders become confused and frightened at what they assume to be an army of wolves.
So, too, are human organizations and families more formidable when the awareness of each individual is celebrated rather than stifled. Each person assumes his share of responsibility for the group by employing his special talents and strengths. By members expressing their own uniqueness and respecting and encouraging the uniqueness of others, the unit becomes a strong, formidable one.
“Over the years I’ve learned a lot about coaching staffs and one piece of advice I would pass along to a young head coach—or a corporate executive, or even a bank president—is this: Don’t make them in your image. Don’t even try. My assistants don’t look alike, think alike, or have the same personalities. And I sure don’t want them thinking like I do. You don’t strive for sameness, you strive for balance.”
~Bear Bryant
Questions to Ponder:
Business
Interdepartmental teams (TQM, CQI, focus groups, etc.) are now utilized worldwide to constantly improve products, services and customer awareness. Unfortunately, these teams are often formed without regard to the psychological makeup of the team members. Outstanding teams consist of individuals with differing gifts. There are several ways to enhance team selection, such as the use of the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), which I frequently administer to groups. How do you make sure your team members will bring out the best in each other?
Family
Do you believe in birth order difference among children? Is it true that most people are tougher on their first born, more indecisive with middle children, and easiest on the baby? Do you respect and enjoy your family members’ differences, or do you try to force them to fit your preconceived mold?
Personal
We all possess unique gifts. We can either contribute these gifts toward the success of our work team and family, or we can use our uniqueness as an excuse to remain aloof and weaken the unit. What are your special contributions? How are you using them?
Copyright Simple Truths, LLC, all rights reserved and reprinted with permission.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Ways to Build Commitment & Positive Attitudes
• Make a list of the things that your boss can do or say that would encourage you be engaged and involved at work. Use this list as a reminder of what you can do to help build others’ commitment.
• Never forget – people support what they help create! Even though it’s just common sense, it’s still an underutilized lesson. When people understand what’s expected and feel like they have contributed to the process, they are many times more likely to be committed to getting the desired results. So when making plans and identifying tasks to perform, ask people What do YOU suggest?
• Each day, ask a team member for something that’s going right. This habit encourages people to look for the positive things that are happening and reinforces what is working.
• Don’t “shoot the messenger.” Instead, make it safe for people to convey bad news that needs to be heard. Say, Thank you for telling me what I needed to know. By eliminating fear, you build trust and commitment for open and honest communication.
• Don’t punish good, committed performers by repeatedly giving them hard-to-do tasks that other people don’t want and therefore don’t put good effort into. Yes, good workers will get it done and do it well. But if you fail to hold others responsible for doing these things, soon even the best performers will likely develop a “bad attitude” about doing them.
• Reinforce good attitudes and fulfilled commitments by getting a LEG up on recognition:
o Look them in the eye
o Explain specifically what they did well
o Give them a great big “Thank You!”
• Never forget – people support what they help create! Even though it’s just common sense, it’s still an underutilized lesson. When people understand what’s expected and feel like they have contributed to the process, they are many times more likely to be committed to getting the desired results. So when making plans and identifying tasks to perform, ask people What do YOU suggest?
• Each day, ask a team member for something that’s going right. This habit encourages people to look for the positive things that are happening and reinforces what is working.
• Don’t “shoot the messenger.” Instead, make it safe for people to convey bad news that needs to be heard. Say, Thank you for telling me what I needed to know. By eliminating fear, you build trust and commitment for open and honest communication.
• Don’t punish good, committed performers by repeatedly giving them hard-to-do tasks that other people don’t want and therefore don’t put good effort into. Yes, good workers will get it done and do it well. But if you fail to hold others responsible for doing these things, soon even the best performers will likely develop a “bad attitude” about doing them.
• Reinforce good attitudes and fulfilled commitments by getting a LEG up on recognition:
o Look them in the eye
o Explain specifically what they did well
o Give them a great big “Thank You!”
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
No Losers
No Losers
They played one of the most memorable high school football games in history in the fall of 2008 in Grapevine, Texas. It was Grapevine Faith vs. Gainesville State School and everything about it was upside down. For instance, when Gainesville State came out to take the field, the Grapevine Faith fans made a 40-yard spirit line for them to run through. That’s right, hometown fans made a spirit line for the visiting team.
The Grapevine fans even made a banner for Gainesville players to crash through at the end. It said, “Go Tornadoes!” Which is also weird, because Faith is the Lions. More than 200 Faith fans sat on the Gainesville side and kept cheering the Gainesville players on—by name.
“I never in my life thought I’d hear people cheering for us,” recalls Gainesville’s QB and middle linebacker, Isaiah.
And even though Faith walloped Gainesville, 33-14, the Gainesville kids were so happy that after the game they gave their head coach, Mark Williams, a sideline squirt-bottle shower like he’d just won a state title. It has to be the first Gatorade bath in history for a coach with a 0-9 record.
But with the game over, everyone could see 12 uniformed officers escorting 14 Gainesville players off the field. They lined the players up in groups of five—handcuffs ready in their back pockets—and marched them to the team bus. That’s because Gainesville is a maximum-security correctional facility 75 miles north of Dallas. Every game it plays is on the road.
This all started when Faith’s head coach, Kris Hogan, wanted to do something kind for the Gainesville team. Faith had never played Gainesville, but he already knew the score. Faith was 7-2 going into the game, Gainesville 0-8 with 2 touchdowns all year. Faith has 70 kids on the roster, 11 coaches, the latest equipment and involved parents. Gainesville has a lot of kids with convictions for drugs, assault and robbery—many of whose families had disowned them—wearing 7 year-old shoulder pads and ancient helmets.
So Hogan had this idea. What if half of our fans—for one night only—cheered for the other team? He sent out an email asking people to do just that. “Here’s the message I want you to send:” Hogan wrote.
“You are just as valuable as any other person on planet Earth.”
Lessons For Leaders:
“You are just as valuable as any other person on planet Earth.”
The leadership lessons in that one statement are as profound as any we might encounter in a dozen best-selling business books. Perhaps more so, because the intended recipients of that message were young men who before this game may never have experienced that sense of value or even believed in their own self-worth. Certainly, they were a group that had never received so valuable a gift from complete strangers.
But one man’s leadership sparked actions that led an entire community to rally behind kids who no one had ever supported; the leader of one team became the model for every team.
How powerful a message do we send as leaders when we proclaim the intrinsic value of every member of our team? And how much greater is that message when we extend that believe even to those we oppose with respect.
They played one of the most memorable high school football games in history in the fall of 2008 in Grapevine, Texas. It was Grapevine Faith vs. Gainesville State School and everything about it was upside down. For instance, when Gainesville State came out to take the field, the Grapevine Faith fans made a 40-yard spirit line for them to run through. That’s right, hometown fans made a spirit line for the visiting team.
The Grapevine fans even made a banner for Gainesville players to crash through at the end. It said, “Go Tornadoes!” Which is also weird, because Faith is the Lions. More than 200 Faith fans sat on the Gainesville side and kept cheering the Gainesville players on—by name.
“I never in my life thought I’d hear people cheering for us,” recalls Gainesville’s QB and middle linebacker, Isaiah.
And even though Faith walloped Gainesville, 33-14, the Gainesville kids were so happy that after the game they gave their head coach, Mark Williams, a sideline squirt-bottle shower like he’d just won a state title. It has to be the first Gatorade bath in history for a coach with a 0-9 record.
But with the game over, everyone could see 12 uniformed officers escorting 14 Gainesville players off the field. They lined the players up in groups of five—handcuffs ready in their back pockets—and marched them to the team bus. That’s because Gainesville is a maximum-security correctional facility 75 miles north of Dallas. Every game it plays is on the road.
This all started when Faith’s head coach, Kris Hogan, wanted to do something kind for the Gainesville team. Faith had never played Gainesville, but he already knew the score. Faith was 7-2 going into the game, Gainesville 0-8 with 2 touchdowns all year. Faith has 70 kids on the roster, 11 coaches, the latest equipment and involved parents. Gainesville has a lot of kids with convictions for drugs, assault and robbery—many of whose families had disowned them—wearing 7 year-old shoulder pads and ancient helmets.
So Hogan had this idea. What if half of our fans—for one night only—cheered for the other team? He sent out an email asking people to do just that. “Here’s the message I want you to send:” Hogan wrote.
“You are just as valuable as any other person on planet Earth.”
Lessons For Leaders:
“You are just as valuable as any other person on planet Earth.”
The leadership lessons in that one statement are as profound as any we might encounter in a dozen best-selling business books. Perhaps more so, because the intended recipients of that message were young men who before this game may never have experienced that sense of value or even believed in their own self-worth. Certainly, they were a group that had never received so valuable a gift from complete strangers.
But one man’s leadership sparked actions that led an entire community to rally behind kids who no one had ever supported; the leader of one team became the model for every team.
How powerful a message do we send as leaders when we proclaim the intrinsic value of every member of our team? And how much greater is that message when we extend that believe even to those we oppose with respect.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Balance sheet of life
Our Birth is our Opening Balance!
Our Death is our Closing Balance!
Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities
Our Creative Ideas are our Assets
Heart is our Current Asset
Soul is our Fixed Asset
Brain is our Fixed Deposit
Thinking is our Current Account
Achievements are our Capital
Character & Morals, our Stock-in-Trade
Friends are our General Reserves
Values & Behaviour are our Goodwill
Patience is our Interest Earned
Love is our Dividend
Children are our Bonus Issues
Education is Brands / Patents
Knowledge is our Investment
Experience is our Premium Account
The Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately.
The Goal is to get the Best Presented Accounts Award.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Some very Good and Very bad things …..
The most destructive habit.....................Worry
The greatest Joy......... ......................Giving
The greatest loss..................Loss of self-respect
The most satisfying work.................Helping others
The ugliest personality trait..............Selfishness
The most endangered species........Dedicated leaders
Our greatest natural resource..................Our youth
The greatest 'shot in the arm'.........Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome...............Fear
The most effective sleeping pill.......Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease.............Excuses
The most powerful force in life................... Love
The most dangerous act..............................A gossip
The world's most incredible computer.........The brain
The worst thing to be without..................... Hope
The deadliest weapon...... ........ .........The tongue
The two most power-filled words....... .... 'I Can'
The greatest asset....... .......... ......... ...........Faith
The most worthless emotion..................Self- pity
The most beautiful attire........................SMILE!
The most prized possession.................Integrity
The most powerful channel of communication. ……..Prayer
The most contagious spirit................Enthusiasm
Life ends; when you stop Dreaming,
Hope ends; when you stop Believing,
Love ends; when you stop Caring,
And Friendship ends; when you stop Sharing...!!!
Our Death is our Closing Balance!
Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities
Our Creative Ideas are our Assets
Heart is our Current Asset
Soul is our Fixed Asset
Brain is our Fixed Deposit
Thinking is our Current Account
Achievements are our Capital
Character & Morals, our Stock-in-Trade
Friends are our General Reserves
Values & Behaviour are our Goodwill
Patience is our Interest Earned
Love is our Dividend
Children are our Bonus Issues
Education is Brands / Patents
Knowledge is our Investment
Experience is our Premium Account
The Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately.
The Goal is to get the Best Presented Accounts Award.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Some very Good and Very bad things …..
The most destructive habit.....................Worry
The greatest Joy......... ......................Giving
The greatest loss..................Loss of self-respect
The most satisfying work.................Helping others
The ugliest personality trait..............Selfishness
The most endangered species........Dedicated leaders
Our greatest natural resource..................Our youth
The greatest 'shot in the arm'.........Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome...............Fear
The most effective sleeping pill.......Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease.............Excuses
The most powerful force in life................... Love
The most dangerous act..............................A gossip
The world's most incredible computer.........The brain
The worst thing to be without..................... Hope
The deadliest weapon...... ........ .........The tongue
The two most power-filled words....... .... 'I Can'
The greatest asset....... .......... ......... ...........Faith
The most worthless emotion..................Self- pity
The most beautiful attire........................SMILE!
The most prized possession.................Integrity
The most powerful channel of communication. ……..Prayer
The most contagious spirit................Enthusiasm
Life ends; when you stop Dreaming,
Hope ends; when you stop Believing,
Love ends; when you stop Caring,
And Friendship ends; when you stop Sharing...!!!
Monday, June 7, 2010
That Stereotype Hurts
Guidelines for Stereotype-Free Communication
Individualize. Treat people as individuals rather than as members of a set.
Avoid stereotypical jokes and humor – they are often demeaning and embarrassing to listeners.
Use accurate descriptions. Replace descriptors, clichés, and labels that rely on stereotypes with specific, accurate, and relevant words. “She reminds you when work is overdue” is more accurate and less stereotypical than “She’s a nag.”
Depict people non-stereotypically in visuals. When using graphics or visuals, ensure that the images do not reinforce stereotypes. For example, use photographs depicting role models that include people of different ages, ethnicities, physical abilities, body sizes and gender rather than depicting all role models as tall, white men.
Solicit multiple opinions. If you are seeking information about a group of people, seek input from multiple sources. Avoid expecting one person to be a “spokesperson” for all members of a group simply because she or he is a member of the group.
Learn the “hot spots." Be sensitive to common negative stereotypes about groups – this will help you understand strong reactions to a seemingly positive description. For instance, a person described as “poor but hard-working” may feel the sting of the unspoken stereotype that people are poor because they are lazy. How do you find out what the hot spots are? Listen! Observe! Ask! Friends or coworkers will likely tell you what stereotypes bother them, if you ask.
Individualize. Treat people as individuals rather than as members of a set.
Avoid stereotypical jokes and humor – they are often demeaning and embarrassing to listeners.
Use accurate descriptions. Replace descriptors, clichés, and labels that rely on stereotypes with specific, accurate, and relevant words. “She reminds you when work is overdue” is more accurate and less stereotypical than “She’s a nag.”
Depict people non-stereotypically in visuals. When using graphics or visuals, ensure that the images do not reinforce stereotypes. For example, use photographs depicting role models that include people of different ages, ethnicities, physical abilities, body sizes and gender rather than depicting all role models as tall, white men.
Solicit multiple opinions. If you are seeking information about a group of people, seek input from multiple sources. Avoid expecting one person to be a “spokesperson” for all members of a group simply because she or he is a member of the group.
Learn the “hot spots." Be sensitive to common negative stereotypes about groups – this will help you understand strong reactions to a seemingly positive description. For instance, a person described as “poor but hard-working” may feel the sting of the unspoken stereotype that people are poor because they are lazy. How do you find out what the hot spots are? Listen! Observe! Ask! Friends or coworkers will likely tell you what stereotypes bother them, if you ask.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
LEARNING ZONE
“For you to be the very best, you cannot allow yourself to become complacent in your comfort zone. You need to be reaching for improvement. To fulfill your potential, you need to move out of your comfort zone and into ‘the learning zone’.”
“There are three rooms in the learning zone. The first room is the reading room. Look around this library – there are more than a thousand books in here. More than half of those books are about management and leadership … Suppose you decided to read one book a month on management or leadership. During the next year, you’d have read 12 books. Do you think you’d know more about management and leadership if you read that many books a year?”
“The second room in the learning zone is the listening room. Did you know that the principal reasons executives fail are arrogance, out-of-control egos, and insensitivity? They forget to take the time to listen to their people. Soon they become insensitive to the needs and desires of the individuals on the team. Don’t allow yourself to fall into that trap – listen to your people!”
“The third room in the learning zone is the giving room. You cannot succeed without giving back. Your legacy will be what you give to others.”
“There are three rooms in the learning zone. The first room is the reading room. Look around this library – there are more than a thousand books in here. More than half of those books are about management and leadership … Suppose you decided to read one book a month on management or leadership. During the next year, you’d have read 12 books. Do you think you’d know more about management and leadership if you read that many books a year?”
“The second room in the learning zone is the listening room. Did you know that the principal reasons executives fail are arrogance, out-of-control egos, and insensitivity? They forget to take the time to listen to their people. Soon they become insensitive to the needs and desires of the individuals on the team. Don’t allow yourself to fall into that trap – listen to your people!”
“The third room in the learning zone is the giving room. You cannot succeed without giving back. Your legacy will be what you give to others.”
Friday, May 21, 2010
Communicate “Why’s” as well as “What’s”
If you’re like most people, there’s a good chance that sometime in the past you’ve committed a de-motivating, yet all too common, mistake: telling people what to do without explaining why it needs to be done.
Perhaps the mistake was unintentional on your part – you just didn’t think before issuing your directive. Or maybe it was intentional – and justified in your mind with a rationalization such as: They don’t need to know why … I don’t have to explain my decisions … I don’t have time to list all the reasons. Either way, it was still a mistake … and a clear demonstration that you had forgotten how lousy it felt when others had done the very same thing to you.
So why was it a mistake? Because it borders on childlike treatment (“Do it because I said so!”) which tends to produce anger, resentment, and half-hearted effort. More importantly, it’s a squandered opportunity to get people on-board with, and committed to, what needs to be accomplished.
Here’s a good rule of thumb to guide your future actions: Unless it will violate a legitimate need for confidentiality, always tell people the good reasons for doing what you want done. That’s your WHAT. Your WHY? Because it’s the appropriate way to deal with adults, it produces positive results, and it’s a courtesy that’s simply the right thing to do.
And one more thing …
If you ever find that you can’t come up with good reasons for acting, stop worrying about others’ commitment and start questioning the action, itself!
Human Nature 101
Adults are more likely to be committed to actions
and behaviors when they understand the
good reasons behind them.
Perhaps the mistake was unintentional on your part – you just didn’t think before issuing your directive. Or maybe it was intentional – and justified in your mind with a rationalization such as: They don’t need to know why … I don’t have to explain my decisions … I don’t have time to list all the reasons. Either way, it was still a mistake … and a clear demonstration that you had forgotten how lousy it felt when others had done the very same thing to you.
So why was it a mistake? Because it borders on childlike treatment (“Do it because I said so!”) which tends to produce anger, resentment, and half-hearted effort. More importantly, it’s a squandered opportunity to get people on-board with, and committed to, what needs to be accomplished.
Here’s a good rule of thumb to guide your future actions: Unless it will violate a legitimate need for confidentiality, always tell people the good reasons for doing what you want done. That’s your WHAT. Your WHY? Because it’s the appropriate way to deal with adults, it produces positive results, and it’s a courtesy that’s simply the right thing to do.
And one more thing …
If you ever find that you can’t come up with good reasons for acting, stop worrying about others’ commitment and start questioning the action, itself!
Human Nature 101
Adults are more likely to be committed to actions
and behaviors when they understand the
good reasons behind them.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Getting Good at Getting Along
Excerpt from Getting Good at Getting Along
Many people say that the best relationships are those that are 50-50. It’s a nice idea, but it often falls short in real life. People hold onto resentments – waiting for the other person to “see the light.” People insist that others take their share of responsibility when an issue comes up: “I’ve done my part; now it’s their turn.” The problem is, you might be waiting a very long time if you always insist that relationships (and their problems) be 50-50 propositions.
If you’re really serious about getting good at getting along with others, here’s an idea that can transform your life: Instead of expecting people to meet you 50-50, try making it 100-0. You take on the entire responsibility for making the relationship work, and don’t worry about whether the other person is doing their part!
Yes, it’s a somewhat radical idea. But if you’re up to really having amazing relationships at work – and in your personal life – this will do it. You’ll never again feel that you’re at the mercy of someone else. You’ll never feel like a victim of another’s actions or inactions.
Here’s how it works …
• Assume that the other person is a given. “He is who he is.” “This is her personality – she isn’t going to change.” Just accept the person exactly as they are – and exactly as they aren’t. This is who you’ve got to work with.
• Ask yourself, How can I change my words or actions when I deal with this person? You don’t have to change your whole personality – you’re just going to use different language and behaviors when dealing with this person.
• Try out new behaviors and new ways of conversing with your “problem person.” See what works and do more of it. If something doesn’t work, stop doing it.
• Learn from others. Watch others who have excellent interpersonal relationships and learn from them. If you want good relationships like those, mimic them.
• When there’s a problem, take ownership of it. As long as someone else is the problem, you’re powerless. But if YOU own the problem, then YOU can own and control the solution.
Many people say that the best relationships are those that are 50-50. It’s a nice idea, but it often falls short in real life. People hold onto resentments – waiting for the other person to “see the light.” People insist that others take their share of responsibility when an issue comes up: “I’ve done my part; now it’s their turn.” The problem is, you might be waiting a very long time if you always insist that relationships (and their problems) be 50-50 propositions.
If you’re really serious about getting good at getting along with others, here’s an idea that can transform your life: Instead of expecting people to meet you 50-50, try making it 100-0. You take on the entire responsibility for making the relationship work, and don’t worry about whether the other person is doing their part!
Yes, it’s a somewhat radical idea. But if you’re up to really having amazing relationships at work – and in your personal life – this will do it. You’ll never again feel that you’re at the mercy of someone else. You’ll never feel like a victim of another’s actions or inactions.
Here’s how it works …
• Assume that the other person is a given. “He is who he is.” “This is her personality – she isn’t going to change.” Just accept the person exactly as they are – and exactly as they aren’t. This is who you’ve got to work with.
• Ask yourself, How can I change my words or actions when I deal with this person? You don’t have to change your whole personality – you’re just going to use different language and behaviors when dealing with this person.
• Try out new behaviors and new ways of conversing with your “problem person.” See what works and do more of it. If something doesn’t work, stop doing it.
• Learn from others. Watch others who have excellent interpersonal relationships and learn from them. If you want good relationships like those, mimic them.
• When there’s a problem, take ownership of it. As long as someone else is the problem, you’re powerless. But if YOU own the problem, then YOU can own and control the solution.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
he 5 Characteristics of the Next Top Sales Person
Character #1 : Results Focused
One of best things about being a sales person is you have a tremendous amount of freedom and discretion in how you use your time. In return, you must be able to stay focused on the big picture and not let small problems or dramas distract you.
Character #2 : Courageous
We all experience fear at one time or another. Great salespeople are courageous in that they are able to act and move forward even in the presence of their own fears. Fear is the reaction we have when you know that you need to do something or that something is going to happen soon that you are not prepared for.
Character #3 : High Energy
The true top-performers got that way by working long and hard to beat out their competition while the other guys were enjoying themselves on the golf course. In short, you must be able to do “Whatever It Takes” to get to the top.
Character #4 : Knows People
The ability to establish rapport and maintain rapport is probably the single most powerful skill a salesperson can have. The most flexible people can adapt and establish rapport with others from a multitude of backgrounds and cultures.
Character #5 : Committed To Growth
Great salespeople got that way by always looking for a better way. They are always improving their approach, their techniques and their attitude. Great salespeople know that they must look for the best examples of excellence and adopt the individual aspects of this that they can use.
One of best things about being a sales person is you have a tremendous amount of freedom and discretion in how you use your time. In return, you must be able to stay focused on the big picture and not let small problems or dramas distract you.
Character #2 : Courageous
We all experience fear at one time or another. Great salespeople are courageous in that they are able to act and move forward even in the presence of their own fears. Fear is the reaction we have when you know that you need to do something or that something is going to happen soon that you are not prepared for.
Character #3 : High Energy
The true top-performers got that way by working long and hard to beat out their competition while the other guys were enjoying themselves on the golf course. In short, you must be able to do “Whatever It Takes” to get to the top.
Character #4 : Knows People
The ability to establish rapport and maintain rapport is probably the single most powerful skill a salesperson can have. The most flexible people can adapt and establish rapport with others from a multitude of backgrounds and cultures.
Character #5 : Committed To Growth
Great salespeople got that way by always looking for a better way. They are always improving their approach, their techniques and their attitude. Great salespeople know that they must look for the best examples of excellence and adopt the individual aspects of this that they can use.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Essentials of Communication
Choose the Right Medium for Your Message
The general rule of thumb is: The more impersonal the information to be conveyed, the more impersonal the method of conveying it. For instance, if you want to set the time and date for a meeting, email or text message is fine. If you’re giving directions to an event, same thing. When all you’re conveying is facts or data, using impersonal modes of communication is appropriate.
The converse is also true: The more personal or sensitive the information to be conveyed, the more personal the medium should be. For instance, if you need to discuss salary or benefits with someone, a face-to-face conversation is always best. Second best choice would be the telephone. You do NOT want to discuss things like salary in an impersonal way – like via email.
It’s the same with emotional issues – topics about which you or others have strong feelings. If you’ve offended someone – pick up the phone and call them. If you’re disappointed in someone else – pick up the phone and call them. Better yet, go see them! Resolving conflicts or misunderstandings are almost always done better in person or on the phone. You need the personal touch.
It is very tempting in these days of instant computer messaging and all sorts of fast, easy ways to communicate, to just use the convenient, fastest way. Don’t do it!
Consider how personal your message is; think about the person(s) on the receiving end; carefully choose a mode of communication that suits the message AND recipient.
The newest computer can merely compound, at speed, the oldest problem in the relations between human beings, and in the end the communicator will be confronted with the old problem of what to say and how to say it.
~Edward R. Murrow
The general rule of thumb is: The more impersonal the information to be conveyed, the more impersonal the method of conveying it. For instance, if you want to set the time and date for a meeting, email or text message is fine. If you’re giving directions to an event, same thing. When all you’re conveying is facts or data, using impersonal modes of communication is appropriate.
The converse is also true: The more personal or sensitive the information to be conveyed, the more personal the medium should be. For instance, if you need to discuss salary or benefits with someone, a face-to-face conversation is always best. Second best choice would be the telephone. You do NOT want to discuss things like salary in an impersonal way – like via email.
It’s the same with emotional issues – topics about which you or others have strong feelings. If you’ve offended someone – pick up the phone and call them. If you’re disappointed in someone else – pick up the phone and call them. Better yet, go see them! Resolving conflicts or misunderstandings are almost always done better in person or on the phone. You need the personal touch.
It is very tempting in these days of instant computer messaging and all sorts of fast, easy ways to communicate, to just use the convenient, fastest way. Don’t do it!
Consider how personal your message is; think about the person(s) on the receiving end; carefully choose a mode of communication that suits the message AND recipient.
The newest computer can merely compound, at speed, the oldest problem in the relations between human beings, and in the end the communicator will be confronted with the old problem of what to say and how to say it.
~Edward R. Murrow
Thursday, May 13, 2010
KEYS TO SUCCESS
Be Prepared
Success at almost anything doesn’t just happen. In almost every area of your life, the more you prepare, the better the result will be.
~Joel H. Weldon
Joel Weldon has been one of America’s most successful and respected professional speakers for more than three decades. In 1989, he was honored as the recipient of the Golden Gavel, the most prestigious award conferred by Toastmasters International. Other winners have included such illustrious names as Walter Cronkite, Earl Nightingale, Art Linkletter, Ken Blanchard and Stephen Covey.
Weldon has also been inducted into the National Speakers Hall of Fame and, in 2006, was named a “Legend of the Speaking Profession.” He’s known worldwide for his unique trademark, a heavy 8-ounce can which sits on the desks of thousands of his clients and customers, with a label that reads: “Success Comes In CANS, Not In Cannots!”
Asked the secret of his success, he cites several factors, including preparation. Although he has given more than 2,800 presentations, he says: “As a professional speaker for more than 35 years, I still invest 50 hours to prepare for each of my custom keynote speeches and seminars. Why? Because to be excellent, I know each idea presented must relate specifically to the audience.”
He adds, “Excellence is the result of effort and preparation. How much time are you willing to invest in order to be amazing at what you do — so people can only describe your results as excellent? It’s one of the keys to your success.”
Success at almost anything doesn’t just happen. In almost every area of your life, the more you prepare, the better the result will be.
~Joel H. Weldon
Joel Weldon has been one of America’s most successful and respected professional speakers for more than three decades. In 1989, he was honored as the recipient of the Golden Gavel, the most prestigious award conferred by Toastmasters International. Other winners have included such illustrious names as Walter Cronkite, Earl Nightingale, Art Linkletter, Ken Blanchard and Stephen Covey.
Weldon has also been inducted into the National Speakers Hall of Fame and, in 2006, was named a “Legend of the Speaking Profession.” He’s known worldwide for his unique trademark, a heavy 8-ounce can which sits on the desks of thousands of his clients and customers, with a label that reads: “Success Comes In CANS, Not In Cannots!”
Asked the secret of his success, he cites several factors, including preparation. Although he has given more than 2,800 presentations, he says: “As a professional speaker for more than 35 years, I still invest 50 hours to prepare for each of my custom keynote speeches and seminars. Why? Because to be excellent, I know each idea presented must relate specifically to the audience.”
He adds, “Excellence is the result of effort and preparation. How much time are you willing to invest in order to be amazing at what you do — so people can only describe your results as excellent? It’s one of the keys to your success.”
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)