anda boleh

“Can Do” versus “Can’t Do”


There’s something about the word “can’t” that raises the hairs on our necks. Maybe we don’t like limits being set for us. Maybe we are just rebellious kids at heart.


Think about it. You hear the word “can’t” and immediately your internal conversations start with:

Why not? … See. I knew she wouldn’t listen … Oh yeah, just watch me!


Regardless, all of us would do well to heed the advice of communication specialists and minimize our use of the word “can’t.” Tell people what you CAN do – what they CAN do. Here are some examples: “You can have your vacation June 19.” “What I can do for you is .…” “Here’s what you can do….” “Tell me what you think you can do in this situation.”

Sounds like a small shift, but it is the small things in communication that make all the difference in the world. We’re so accustomed to using “can’t” that this switch will require discipline. It takes practice but it’s well worth the effort. The difference between CAN and CANNOT is shorter in letters, but longer in results.

Creating Passion

Creating Passionate Performers


What does Passionate Performance look like? How will you know when your employees are giving it? Look for signs of the big payoff from Passionate Performance: discretionary effort – people choosing to do more for you. You’ll know your employees are giving discretionary effort when they:

• choose to work late to complete a project;

• ask how they can better serve another team member or department;

• inquire about how their actions affect another function or the customer;

• make a connection between their decisions and the company’s financial results;

• treat company resources like their own;

• initiate improvements in work methods;

• look beyond their own roles for improvement opportunities; and

• pursue self-development on their own time.

Rule for staying positive

Rule #1 Wait to Worry


“Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, but only empties today of its strength.”

~Charles Spurgeon

I used to worry. A lot. The more I fretted, the more proficient I became at it. Anxiety begets anxiety. I even worried that I worried too much! Ulcers might develop. My health could fail. My finances could be depleted to pay the hospital bills. To get some perspective, I visited a well known Dallas businessman, Fred Smith. Fred mentored such luminaries as motivational whiz Zig Ziglar, business guru Ken Blanchard and leadership expert John Maxwell. Fred listened as I poured out my concerns and then said, “Vicki, you need to learn to wait to worry.”

As the words sank in, I asked Fred if he ever spent time fretting. To my surprise, he confessed that in years gone by he had been a top-notch worrier! As a young man, Fred landed a high-paying executive job. Yet he’d only earned a high school degree. He was afraid someone with a college degree would come along and snag his job. Each night after work, he sat with a cup of coffee worrying about losing his position because he thought no other job could compare to the one he had. As he fretted, he started to realize that he wasn’t anxious based on fact, he was anxious based on his imagination. He was borrowing trouble.

He thought to himself, “Fred, are you a better, more valuable employee if you stay up late worrying? Do you do your best work if you’re tired and tense?” “I decided that I would wait to worry!” he explained. “I decided that I’d wait until I actually had a reason to worry – something that was happening, not just something that might happen – before I worried. As it turns out, I never lost that job. My boss was very happy with my performance.”

“When I’m tempted to get alarmed,” he confided, “I tell myself, ‘Fred, you’ve got to wait to worry! Until you know differently, don’t worry.’ And I don’t. Waiting to worry helps me develop the habit of not worrying and that helps me not be tempted to worry.”